Emo's War

Captain Nemo! One of the great nautical adventurers, driven by who knows what real motive? The fate of his family clearly played a part (- I checked Wikipedia) but other things seem to be on his mind too, such as war, adventure, anti-imperialism, or - in the case of the motive I chose for Nemo last night - science!

Nemo's War is a slightly sand-boxy affair, where your choices are actions, and actions are numerous: move, adventure, attack, incite uprisings, search for treasure. The four motives above give you some sense of direction, as they dictate what you score points for at the end of the game. It's no use being a war-like Nemo and spending your time fascinated by algae. People will be disappointed in you.

The game itself takes place over three acts, on a busy-looking board. But despite the Victorian info-graphic appearance, it's not as complicated as it looks - most of the rules are actually on the board itself, and they go like this:

Turn over an Adventure card. They may give you an Event where something happens, an event where if you go somewhere, you can make something happen, or a Test. When you test - and indeed, when you fight, search or incite, you can leverage elements of the Nautilus in your favour - hull, crew, or Nemo himself. The progress you make is all about dice-rolling, and leveraging means add +1, 2 or 3 to your roll. The catch is that if you fail, the health of the hull/crew/Nemo deteriorates, and as it does so, leveraging gets both less effective, and more risky.

Having dealt with the card, dice are then rolled that do two things; adding more ships to the seas of the world, and giving a number of actions (high die - low die = available actions. If both die are the same it is a lull turn - more on that later)

In the novel characters such as Prof Arannax, Conseil and Ned Land are captured, but the game assumes they are already aboard - the former two, in a clear case of Stockholm Syndrome, are itching for adventire. Ned Land on the other hand is understandably furious. It's the first hint - for those who haven't read the novel - that Nemo is not all sweetness and light.

But let's not dwell on the idiosyncrasies of our hero (me) just because they involve kidnap and slavery. Away I/Nemo went (a distinction of identity I struggled with throughout the trip, as I first found myself taking on his identity, before trying to later psychologically remove myself from his more extreme behaviour) on a great solo adventure, headed for the sea in a quest for scientific discovery, possibly to end in death, or at least insanity. What awaits all of us, ultimately, but this? (Obviously death, but maybe insanity first. Bear in mind we are perpetually in a submarine shaped like a giant narwal)

It all began rather ominously when having prepped both a glass of wine and a pack of crisps, the first card I flipped was...

ACT I

From the diaries of Captain Nemo, Scientist

Magnetic Mines

A TEST! Pass, and in the future it may occur to me to upgrade my great machine with these powerful weapons. All I need to do is roll a ten or higher with 2d6. But it was test I failed, despite leveraging both crew and hull in my favour, giving me +4. I just need to roll a six. I roll a five. Even Nemo knows - at this point; later things may change - that five and four don't make ten.

Unwilling to fall at the first hurdle, I reluctantly sacrifice Conseil, assistant to Professor Aronnax, in order to give me a re-roll. I roll a five again. We have barely left shore and I sense the rivets of the Nautilus rattling. It is not how I foresaw the day this morning over my breakfast. Already furious, I sacrifice Aronnax himself (+3 to die roll) in order to pass the test - hooray! and kill off two of my crew before we have left sight of land. Ned Land looks wary.

Vanikero 

No idea what that means (editor: I did try reading 20,00 Leagues Under the Sea but gave up) but if I get to the Pacific, I have a feeling there is treasure there. Maybe I'll just nurture this feeling for now.  I have actions, and decide to incite an uprising in the South Atlantic, and sail to Cape Horn, which is on the way to the Pacific. Peering through the porthole of my great ship, I look out for science.

As Master Wishes

If Conseil was still alive, I could have harvested some treasure. But he's dead. I tell Ned to stop muttering under his breath. Sail to the Pacific and spent an action finding two treasures. Examining them I find myself underwhelmed. I remember I am more interested in Liberation and Wonders - along with Science of course. I better look for some science, which means having adventures. Which are expensive. (two actions!)

An Underwater Coalfield! 

I could sail back to the Atlantic and cash it in for some hull repairs, but if I don't then this counts as science. I keep it. Feeling invigorating (four actions!) I go adventuring. I find that Prussia has declared war! Fortunately for me, Prussia has no ships. At all. Emboldened, I attack Themis, a French armoured frigate. I don't really want to do this, but if the oceans fill up with ships, I will eventually get crowded out (and lose the game).

So I am somewhat beholden let go batshit now and again on unsuspecting sailors. A Bold attack means I lose the advantage of stealth (+1 for Stalk attack) , but on the other hand, if successful, I can keep attacking all the ships in Eastern Pacific - either for a points haul later or - far more exciting l- tonnage, which I can convert into upgrades on the Nautilus. I started the game with Monstrous Design, but I have my eye on Strengthened Prow. Bloody Themis hits me, doing damage to both the crew and Nemo himself. I/Nemo retorts with a mouth-foaming sally, sinking not only the Themis, but also - in a flurry of spectacular dice rolls - civilian ship Thermopylae, another French warship in the Belliqueuse, and the unsuspecting British Clyde. By the time Nemo has calmed down, his notoriety has shot up the track:

Whatever Nemo's Motive, one way to lose the game is to have your notoriety hit a critical point on the track and become a Pariah. As a scientist, mine is the lowest of the four possible...

I still have one action left but I save it for the next lull turn (where certain actions are cheaper to do) pour myself a glass of wine and decant some wasabi crisps out for the crew.

Shortage of Air

It's another test. But with the help of the crew, I, Nemo, pass it and harvest some science as a result. I spend my two actions Refitting the Nautilus, adding Magnetic Mines to the various levers I imagine at my disposal. Conseil and Aronnnax did not die in vain!

Sunken Treasure

It is randomly assigned to the Eastern Pacific, where I happily happen to be. Yet again I roll 4+2, and I scientifically note that the South Atlantic is full of ships: if more arrive they will spill out onto neighbouring seas, then reveal what type of ships they are, then flip to their warmongering side, and if there is no more room after that, the game ends with the Nautilus being simply crowded out of the water. I'll have to go and sink some of them. That's just maths. Meantime I search for treasure and find not only two treasures, but the aforementioned sunken treasure too. It's all going rather too well for my/Nemo's paranoid mind. I sail back to Cape Horn, intent on, not revenge exactly, but whatever revenge is when nothing is actually being avenged. Mindless violence I guess.

ACT II

Another die is added to the ship-placement roll. This means more ships... despite Nemo's mostly-peaceable intentions, he will have to take care of some business.

The Whales

It's another test. I pass it and gain two treasures. Two actions - I sail to the south Atlantic and make a bold attack. Thanks to my Magnetic Mines, I can attack the Royal Sovereign before it sees me coming. Astonishing rolling sees not only the ironclad battleship scuttled, but the Chance passenger ship and the Japanese Kotetsu. I am loving these mines! cries Nemo, as he accidentally ploughs his hand into a bowl of cardboard chits instead of the wasabi crisps. The crew look anywhere but at his face. Maybe some blood is visible through a porthole.

The Arabian Tunnel

If I make it to the Indian Ocean, I can find a tunnel. Don't ask me how, it's just a feeling. Yet again I roll 4+2 (curses!) and spend both actions sailing to the Indian Ocean. Here's that tunnel! I told you so. Science.

The Transatlantic Cable

If I go back to the North Atlantic... ah, I can't be bothered. Even Nemo, in his embryonic madness, finds going backwards and forwards a bit tedious. Instead... 1+1. A lull turn. If you have saved an action, repairing or refitting the ship only costs one action instead of two. But having not saved any actions, I do nothing but check for uprisings. There aren't any.

Some Days Ashore

I could grant the crew a bit of me-time if I went back to the Pacific, but balls to that. I'm inciting again, now my sunken treasure helps me, for some reason. Doesn't sound like science, but it works. It is not for me to question the ways, etc.

The Coral Realm

...another test. Another high roll,  and I pass. the crew seem to have put their doubts about me to one side and are now in high spirits. Maybe I'll celebrate with an adventure. But I roll 4+4 so it's another lull turn. No uprisings, yet.

The Gulf Stream

I have discovered it - happily whilst idling in the South Atlantic I noticed I was drifting north, and found I have arrived in the Western Pacific. Annoyingly I roll another lull turn, and watch in dismay as the Abraham Lincoln sails into view, its occupants with high reedy voices and bad teeth.

The Torres Straights

If I travel between the Indian Ocean and the Western Pacific I get 2 bonus actions. As I'm in the Western Pacific already, I roll 4+6 and after sinking Abraham, City of Adelaide and Lord Clyde (both Britain) I sail back to the Indian Ocean, triggering the extra actions. The oceans are starting to fill at an alarming rate now, but I really want to refit so I spend the last two actions getting a strengthened prow. I cannot believe the rolls I'm getting. I'm like the guy who put everything on red and it came up red.

The Indian Ocean

More good fortune - I'm there already! I gain one Nemo (he's back to almost-sane) and roll a juicy three actions. I spend two adventuring - picking up the Wonder of the Red Sea, along with a treasure - then go on the warpath against the Japanese Ryujo. This place needs a tidy.

I roll a clunker: 1 + 2. There's no way out of this - or is there? With my leveraged crew at +3 and my strengthened prow giving me +1, I'm actually at 7. I need 10.  I could sacrifice my first officer for another +3, but then again she can be let go for three bonus actions so... I notice her eyes on me as I mull things over, and decide to take the hit from the Ryujo instread.

It's not too bad: Nemo's eye starts winking a bit, but otherwise the ship stays steady. But that's the turn over.

An Underwater Forest

It's another test, and another rubbish roll. I say goodbye to Ned Land in order to bump it up just high enough, and claim two treasures. Two actions, so I attack the Ryujo again. I fail again. We get hit with a counter attack, reducing Nemo from Strong to Determined. The crew look Peeved. I order a second attack, and Ryujo is sunk - along with Jylland (Swiss) and Alfred, the British passenger ship! Sorry Alfred. I needed the tonnage.

As a result of all this nefarious activity, my notoriety has got to the point where the Brits are preparing a task force to police the seas...

Aegri Somnia

The Nautilus floats through some phosphorescent algae, and I/Nemo have/has a bad trip. But he makes a note in his diary, because Science. I have two actions. I boldly/psychopathically sacrifice the Chief Engineer for two more and sail back to the South Atlantic, where I go to town with a bold attack, wiping out everything in a frenzy. Somewhere north of me, sailors are boarding battleships in Blighty... I keep my last action, hoping to refit during a lull turn.

ACT III

I can either change Nemo's motive (from Science to one of the other three, mentioned what seems like eons ago now) or get an upgrade for the Nautilus. I go for the latter, choosing the Arcane Library. An extra white die is added to the placement roll, giving me options on how many actions I get, or whether to have a lull turn...

A Capital Encounter

A ship comes searching for me, and I sink the bugger. Three actions, so I incite, sail to the North Atlantic, then incite twice more. I'm not so much the inquisitive Darwin Nemo as the Fidel Castro Nemo.

Lost Time

Lose an Upgrade Card. Seems a bit arbitrary, but that's the ocean. I dump Fog Machine (reduces notoriety) as I'm in no imminent danger of losing because of that.. or at least, that's my thinking at this stage. It's risky leaving the Eastern Pacific as it is - filling up with ships - but I sail to the European Seas and incite some more revolts - Ireland this time. I get around.

Jaws Wide Open!

A test. I fight off a shark whilst clearing some blood off the windscreen, and come back aboard strutting about. I don't know. Deep inside, I'm starting feel Nemo, for all his worldly comrade-inciting dandiness, is a bit of a fucking psycho. Five actions! LET'S KILL! But first, start the Spanish Revolution. I then return to the Indian Ocean and attack the Fujiyama, who gets a shot in first. Nemo catches it in his teeth and goes  back from determined to steady. Then he counters: Wiping out both the Fujiyama and the America. Then - breaking the fourth wall - I remember in horror I'm supposed to up notoriety every time I continue a bold attack, and have to do a quick calculation - I haven't lost, but I'm far, far closer to the Pariah defeat than I thought I was. Embarrassed, I stop attacking and incite the Selangor Civil War instead. I then look for treasure and find two bits of it.

Ned Land's Tempers

Despite being dead, Ned is attacking someone and needs calming down in a test. Thank the lord I talked him down - there's only room for one lunatic on the ship. I spend all my actions travelling to the south pacific, which is about to jump the shark, population-wise.

Vigo Bay 

...something about the North Atlantic. I barely read it, and attack the fleets of the Pacific, seeing off the Italians and Dutch before prancing off to Hawaii to start a revolution. They will shout my name from the rooftops of Honolulu!

A Hollow Explosion

...more ships, including the Omaha, which I bat away like a gnat. Two actions, though, and I am in dire trouble - game-ending-in-ignominous-defeat trouble - if any more ships rock up in the South Atlantic. I sacrifice my First Officer for +3 actions (making Nemo mentally Erratic in the process)  and speed there post-haste, using my final two actions to attack. I'd love to be doing some bloody science, but there's too many fucking sailors around.

The Hercules attacks first, and misses! And the Nautilus returns fire and sinks the bastard! I am just about to open fire on every other bugger in sight when I realise my notoriety is topped out. All my inciting uprisings has sustained me thus far, but even the recently-downtrodden know a madman when they see one. I have to back away, using my final action to sail to the Cape of Good Hope in preparation for my next bit of political engineering...

Required Repairs

Just a pain in the arse. I ignore it - it's all about survival now. A single action! I hurl pamphlets into the diamond mines of Southern Africa and reduce notoriety. The populace of the world find me confusing; smashing the yoke of oppression one moment, killing hundreds of innocents the next. But fame is a fickle thing, and at least my most recent bit of news is shedding the right kind of blood.

Captain Nemo's Thunderbolt 

A test! - passed by a whisker. But there is barely time to make note of its narrative weight - it's desperate times on the board now, with ships out the wazoo, as Nemo probably said, and no political will to support any more scattergun killing, like I did in the good old days. All I can do is sail to the Indian Ocean and hope I don't roll any fives...

Aronnax's Determination 

From beyond the grave he haunts me, like Banquo's ghost eating my crisps. It's a test: if I pass, I can bring my First Officer back to life! Fail, and the gloomy sky will darken further. I leverage all I can and roll the destiny dice:

My rolling finally gives way. I/we fail by a single pip to reanimate the First Officer, and my attempts at such witchery somehow spread, despite my being all alone on the Nautilus with no Instagram. I have to roll 1d3 and need to roll a 2 to avoid failure - I roll a six! All is lost! I cheat and roll again, rolling a 5. All is really lost!! Then I cheat and roll again. This time I roll a life-saving 1, but a crack in the fabric of reality lets the light in - I know I am merely escaping to insanity, like Johnathan Pryce at the end of Brazil. All is definitely lost! If Davy Jone's locker isn't  calling my name, someone is - and not in a very nice tone of voice. I am a Pariah. No longer can I sail the seas freeing the plebs from the bourgeoisie and randomly icing holidaymakers. No longer will I clutch treasure in my hands, or ponder the wisdom of adventuring when it does after all cost two actions. All my emotional inner turmoil has come to a bad end, like a goth teenager told to stop sulking and knuckle down, after all kids in Africa, etc etc...  The game is Nemo's War, and the war is over.

The End

In one way it's really disappointing - I've never rolled anything like this well before, but when I was turning so bloodthirsty I should have taken the opportunity to change Nemo's motive from Science to something else at the start of Act III... but by that time I had invested so much in the pursuit of science and rebel uprisings, I didn't even consider it. A decision I would come to regret.

From a narrative point of view, it was all fantastic fun though; I had very fond memories of playing Nemo's War last year but I had forgotten how much of a silly dice-chucker it is as well as a narrative - I must say, it tells a brilliantly surreal and dramatic story. It does feel slightly odd that whatever motive you choose, you are forced to engage in violence to a greater and greater degree because if there is nowhere to place or flip a ship, the game is a defeat - and the oceans do fill up rapidly when Act III arrives. But it's a lot of fun, and from what I can glean from my readings*, very close to the source material in that respect also.

* I did buy the book last year, but I haven't read it.