Formula Bum

I arrived online to find a gallery of faces on Discord, intent and serious, so I assumed that they had already started a game. It turns out they hadn't, and no doubt I'd arrived in a lull in the hilarious conversation. Either way, Ian, Martin, Sam, Joe and I began a quick game of For Sale while we waited for Andy.

At the time I was still preparing food for my girlfriend and, besides, my audio connection seemed very quiet so I made little attempt at banter. The bidding round ended in a frustrating manner, with the 29 and 30 coming out in the final round, long after I'd spent most of my money.

I remember little about the second half of the game, except for picking up a zero dollar card with a 21. It ended in a deal heat.

Sam 54 (same cash as Martin)
Martin 54 (same cash as Sam)
Andrew 52
Joe 47
Ian 44

With Andy on board the six of us chose Downforce (odds betting, no superpowers). I never really had any form in this game and that continued. My sole successful bet was due to someone else helpfully pushing my black car over the line. 

Joe was of the opinion that it would be perfectly possible to give this game a colonic retheme. To which Martin added that you wouldn't even need to change the name. There then followed a few punning names for Formula One drivers (Ayrton Senokot, Michael Poomacher) and after this did I imagine things or did the anal puns continue? People complained about being rammed from behind or shunted in the slow lane. Probably my imagination.

Sam won in a tight race of bottlenecks and frustration.

Sam 19
Ian 18
Joe 15
Andrew 7
Martin 1
Andy -4

Then Sam left and, after disappearing to answer the front door for a few minutes, Joe signed off too. The remaining four went for Love Letter. Since we were unable to change the winning criteria to three points, we knew it might be a bit of an undertaking, but we crashed on regardless.

The highlight for me was whenever Andy (screen name Baron Frog) was accused of being a baron. If the guess was right, that was funny because it's so obvious and if it was wrong then BGA would add a note to the commentary down the side of the screen saying "Baron Frog is NOT a baron" as if it were appalled at the presence of an imposter in our midst.

Midway through the game, Andy gave up on Discord and communicated with us on the BGA chat, which Martin used to see which swear words got an automated warning message. Bum did, but Poo didn't, if I recall correctly.

Anyway, the game began by looking like it'd be over soon. Ian won the first two rounds and then Martin got to three points. Andy and I got back into contention until the score was 3-3-3-2. Improbably, Ian hadn't scored since his opening flurry. But then he won the next two rounds to take the victory. It was almost as if he'd just been toying with us.

Ian 4
Andy 3
Martin 3
Andrew 3

And so we were spent and we went our separate ways. Thanks all. See you next Tuesday.

I’m overlooking a four-leaf clover

I arrived late and watched the second half of a game of Lucky numbers while sorting out my drinks. Ian was first to get to his last tile, but luck was against him and he couldn't place that final one, allowing enough time for Andy to catch up and steal a win.

In the end of game statistics Sam discovered he had seven minutes thinking time, which he was appalled by until he remembered that included the rules explanation.

Next up was Decrypto, the latest board game to be given an online presence with a .io domain. The site was functional and pretty boring, but it seemed to work fine, barring some peculiar word choices. We had "Wriggler" among our code words. Sam and Martin teamed up together "for old times' sake" and Ian, Andy and me made up the other team.

I can't say I was completely up to speed with the game. We got a miscommunication in round one before we fluked an interception in round two by simply guessing 1, 2, 3. Martin and Sam used clever clues to avoid any miscommunication and then used logic to intercept us in round two as well. Finally, after some very literal clues from ourselves, Martin and Sam got the second interception in round three, making this perhaps the shortest game of Decrypto I've played.

Sam and Martin, double agents

Ian, Andy, Andrew, halfwits

Next we played 7 Wonders. Usually this is Ian's strong suit but this time he was predicting his failure early on.

Andy insisted his wonder forced him to go big on military (because otherwise he’s such a peac-loving opponent). Sam finished fourth after being convinced he was in the running

Andy 66

Martin 58

Andrew 53 (+ cash)

Sam 53

Ian 45

Next up was For Sale and we began with the worst 9 ever: pick it up for free and allow everyone else to help themselves to 20+ cards. In the second half of the game Andy charitably picked up both zeroes.

Martin 57

Ian 54

Andrew 53

Sam 48

Andy 43

Now Sam left and Ian was on the verge of departing too, suggesting a short game as his finale. We chose Kingdomino and watched in amazement as Ian built a 60+ point forest. Martin’s lake couldn’t compare.

Ian 85

Martin 72

Andy 56

Andrew 49

Ian’s win seemed to give him a second win, as he deferred sleep in favour of a game of Downforce. Despite being a speedy one-lap race, I was able to make my bed during the downtime between my turns. Martin won the race but Andy bet on him so he won the game.

Andy 21

Martin 15

Andrew 14 (+ cash)

Ian 14

Now Ian finally retired and the remaining three played Lucky Numbers. Andy won again. But, mind you, he had a 3-20 spread early on while I began with numbers on my board ranging from 3-11. I never stood a chance (is my excuse).

And thus we were done. Thanks all.

The weariness of long distance gamers

This week I arrived later than usual, at around 8pm to find Sam, Joe, Andy, Martin and Ian already online. I have no idea if they'd played a game or had spent the past half hour chatting, but before long Katy joined us and, as is traditional for a septet, we played 7 Wonders.

It was the usual affair, notable for being very red, with military cards built by everyone except Joe, who preferred science. But it was the quiet one who got back into winning ways, and with the least thinking time, too.

Ian 61

Joe 55

Katy 53

Martin 50

Andrew 49

Andy 47

Sam 43

Then we split into two groups. Joe, Martin and Katy chose Ninety Nine, which seems appropriate since Joe had been eating an ice cream earlier.

Ian, Sam, Andy and myself procrastinated at length over what to play. Without an admin account we couldn't do anything with playingcards.io and so in the end we chose Red7. 

Sam needed a rule refresher and we had to start twice after Ian had set up the game with an unwanted option still turned on.

The game certainly didn't outstay it's welcome, with Andy being the first to win two rounds in a healthy 2-0-0-0 win. He was nice enough to mumble something about playing Red7 a lot on yukata lately. 

After this Sam left for bed and we chose Downforce as our next game. It was the track with all those ramps again and the three of us sped round in more or less silence. It ended in Andy's favour again, although none of us actually bet on the winning car.

Andy $19m

Ian $13m

Andrew $8m

By now Ninety Nine had ended at almost the same time. Katy had, I believe, lead for most of the game, only to see a late revival from Joe.

Joe 177

Katy 169

Martin 155

And here marked the end of Ian's gaming since he was flaking and we couldn't tempt him with a game of For Sale (which BGA seemed to think was Joe's first ever go. How odd). 

Odder still, in the buying round, both zeros came out in round one, followed by some very generous rounds where players dumped their low cards knowing they'd get a good return. Martin won, despite having forgotten earlier that with only five players there's an extra round of bidding.

Martin 55

Andy 54

Andrew 49

Joe 44

Katy 41

And now Joe left so we remaining four played Hanabi. Peculiarly, while Downforce was played in silence, we played Hanabi with a steady stream of chatter. Or "cheating" as it could be called. Clues were applauded or given the Martin "that's what I would've done" seal of approval, indicating how prescient it was.

And we didn't discard any cards that would ruin our chances but, alas, time caught up with us. The draw deck was exhausted with little chance of a successful completion.

Andy, Martin, Katy, Andrew 20

And so we were off into the night. Or back into our kitchens with our empties. Thanks guys. See you next week.

Double Baron Shotgun

This week, with numbers depleted to the usual mid summer level, four gamers gradually logged on. Ian first then, about ten minutes late, I arrived. Followed by Martin and then finally Andy,who entered with his signature method of logging on and off repeatedly until he properly arrived.

While waiting for him, the three of us had decided on Turn The Tide as our first game, previously seen some years ago as Land Unter.  It was so long ago that Andy couldn't remember if he'd played it or not. So he looked it up: he had, and had given it four out of ten. Clearly not his type of game. Meanwhile, Martin was initially upset by the slurping noise the game made when he lost a life, but I had to admit that it’d been me eating.

Martin 16

Andrwe 12

Ian 2

Andy 1

Next up was Downforce with a track chosen especially by Andy, with ramps. This made it a lot more swingy. My red car managed to get from a distant last to a fourth place finish and, more importantly, Andy’s blue car was in third when the first bidding round happened, but finished first. As such, he was the only one to bet on it three times and thus came out the winner. 

Andy $27m

Andrew $15m

Martin $7m

Ian $6m

Next, for a change of pace, some co-operative play with Hanabi. Except that BGA now has a “hand of the day” option where you can try a particular deck and see how well you do against other teams. Finally, Hanabi has gone competitive.

The game was going well, except the blue one didn’t come out. At on point Andy confidently said “I know I haven’t got the red 5” while the red 5 was in his hand, and then I ruined everything by throwing away the second yellow 4, making a perfect finish impossible.

Our score: 21

Finally, with Ian flaking, we decided to finish on Love Letter. Except with four players and first-to-four winning condition, it wasn’t quite as quick as we’d expected. Martin sped into a 2-0-0-0 lead but Ian was first to reach match point on 3-2-2-0. That was me on zero.  But then the tide turned and I started picking up points.

I think a couple of times people got stuck with two Barons in their hand, which is almost certain doom, especially if the guards and a priest have already been played. And at the start of one round, Ian played a King to swap his hand with Martin. I knew that there was only one reason to play your King right at the start so I immediately used my Guard to accuse Martin of being the Princess. Which he was.

By now I was back in the swing of things and in that very round I closed out an unlikely win.

Andrew 4

Ian 3

Andy 3

Martin 3

And, forty minutes after that game had started, we were done. Thanks all. See you soon.

More Technical Difficulties

The lockdown continues in one form or another, and so seven housebound gamers joined together for battle at a distance. No Joe or Sam, so our numbers contained Martin, Ian, Andrew, Adam H and Katy at first and then Adam T and Andy B a little later on.

We began with For Sale, where a bid of six is now called “the classic six,” thanks to its frequent use as an opening bid or raise. Katy was very pleased with her “joint second” or, as everyone else called it, “third.”

Martin 56
Ian 52+ tie breaker
Katy 52
Adam 51
Andrew 40

Then we waited for the other Adam and Andy B and while we did we sorted out those who hadn’t reciprocated friendship on the GNN group. This was mostly Katy who only had eight friends. How cold. Then Adam T arrived and we saw Andy B wink in and out of existence for a while until he joined us for a game of 7 Wonders.

Katy quickly found her internet connection was a little dodgy and she frequently ended up offline and had to reboot her machine. While we waited patiently, I quipped that it would be quicker to actually build the seventh wonder.

Adam H 57
Andrew 54
Katy 47 + cash
Martin 47
Andy 36
Ian 33
Adam T 29

Then we split into two. Martin, Adam T, Katy and I played American Bookshop, the cunning trick taker from Japan. It was my first game and I enjoyed it, even if I never quite understood what to play and when. Katy scored positively in every round and won by a mile. Adam never recovered from his -11 round, and I picked up -14 in one round myself.

Katy 27
Martin 1
Andrew -2
Adam -5

Then others played Downforce, which I kept an eye on. They played the variant with powers or something. Anyway, Ian bought three cars while Adam H only had one. And guess what it finished first, by a mile. And at the end of the game we discovered that everyone had always bet on it.

Adam $24m
Andy $23m
Ian $8m

After this they played Red 7 which went on for a surprisingly long time (also with powers, I think). The length of effort barely reflected in the scores.

Ian 2
Adam 1
Andy 0

We had finished American Bookstore and Adam T had left us, so the three of us played Eggs of Ostrich. This game was notable for Katy and I playing an identical game in round three. Amazingly, this ended badly for both of us because on the final card Katy thought she had no choice about what to play and so blurted out that she’d passed. I could see a winning move, but I had to pass as well otherwise I’d burst a bag. Our passing gave all the eggs to Martin who took them gratefully and used them to steal the win right at the end.

Martin 33
Katy 31
Andrew 24

Then the two groups joined together and since we played 7 Wonders with seven, it was only right and proper that we play 6nimmt with six. Ian went clear in round one, and I think that was the only time anyone managed that in what was a pretty brutal game. Martin got into a death spiral which not only triggered the end of the game, but then continued no afterwards thus giving him a shockingly low score.

Adam's turn. Hmm... which row would you choose?

Ian 60
Katy 54
Andy 24
Andrew 23
Adam H 0
Martin -27

And so we were done. I’m sure Katy’s aging tablet breathed a sigh of relief when she finally shut it down. In the meantime we’ll come back and do this all again next week.

Back to Babylonia

I arrived at games night this week and was immediately warned by Sam not to lean back on the rear two legs of a chair. If his nightmare was anything to go by, it would result in me crushing my head against a wall. What a way to start the evening.

We began as a seven (Sam, Martin, Joe, Ian, Katy, the initially silent Andy and myself) so we played 7 Wonders. Sam bemoaned the lack of brick in his neighbourhood, Joe built eleven military points and I was so under-prepared that for me round three was mostly made up of cards with red crosses on them. Quiet Ian won again, and again he had the least thinking time. When asked for his secret, he just said stuff that I was trying to do anyway. I'm clearly missing something.

Ian 63
Sam 57
Joe 56
Andy 45
Martin 42
Katy 37 plus cash
Andrew 37

Then we split into two groups. Sam, Andy and Katy played Down Force on BGA. Martin, Ian, Joe and I chose Babylonia on Vassal, the sandbox-y website for recreating board games online.

I tried to keep an eye on Down Force, and I watched with interest as orange stalled near the finishing line, only to see green speed past for the win. Pity that everyone bet on yellow, then.

Andy $13m
Sam $9m
Katy $6m

Then they played again and, according to an email from Sam this morning, he was so tired he bid on the wrong car, played the wrong cards and thought that orange was red.

Andy $29m
Katy $11m
Sam $8m

As for us, we had to struggle with Vassal's unwieldy interface. Joe was using a pen to control his cursor and found it difficult to access the right click menu needed to flip his counters over. Martin often flipped them for him, asking if Joe needed help in the same way you'd ask a five year old if the needed their food cut up.

I accidentally put one of my counters on a tile and when I picked it up I found they had stuck together and no amount of picking up and putting down would separate them. I managed to get out of it by using the Undo button until I was back where I started.

As for the game, it worked fine online. I was lucky in that I was mostly left alone on the central island while all about me wars were waged. It was also very level in terms of cities. A close game.

Martin 138
Andrew 137
Ian 133
Joe 114

At this point the two groups were both back in sync. Joe and Sam left and the remaining five played For Sale. I started very well, picking up a 23 house for free. Meanwhile, in the selling phase Katy got $0 even though she’d played an 18. “You’re such a bunch of…” she said. Ian, on the other hand, picked up $14m with only a 9. Martin won, having ended up with a run of middling cards which seemed to do well for him. He mentioned that it meant he didn’t have to think so much.

Martin 58
Andy 55
Ian 53
Andrew 51
Katy 39

We played again. I bid high for a 30 house in the first round and then have to pass for the next four rounds as the bidding is always out of my league. Ian repeated his knack of picking up big cheques cheaply when he got the $15m with only a 13 house. Not sure what happened to Katy. Maybe she’s not good at For Sale or maybe she was disturbed by the noise of Any’s keyboard which sounded like an alien chomping on human bones.

Martin 59
Ian 52=
Andy 52=
Andrew 51
Katy 33

Katy wanted to play 6nimmt, keen to try a game that she was good at. But the fates were against her tonight as she ran into trouble early on (“I think I’m going to be sick,” she said). I was in first place until the final (fourth?) round when Andy missed a chance to screw me over when he decided to target Martin instead and managed to achieve neither. My luck didn’t last, though and I went into a death spiral (partly thanks to Katy) and ended in second.

Matin 33
Andrew 23
Andy 15
Ian 11
Katy -3

And then Ian left and the last of us chose Tea Time to close. I had to dash off mid game to give a neighbour some soy sauce. At least, that’s my excuse.

Martin 33
Katy 28
Andy 26
Andrew 24

Martin had neatly wrapped up a Perfect Five in one evening, and all without leaving his sofa. How clever. Congrats.

A night on the tiles

This week we (Sam, Joe, Martin, newcomer Steve, Katy, Ian, latecomer Adam H and me) converged around Sam’s kitchen table for more board game shenanigans. With a new gamer joining us, we explained that we usually start with a communal game and then promptly split into two groups (using the logic that we can all play together when Adam gets here).

Katy, Martin, Joe and Steve played QE. As Steve’s introduction to modern board gaming, it’s a bit of a curve ball. It’s just as easy to be bamboozled by it’s charms as entertained. It began with Martin and Katy taking all the early spoils before Joe and Steve came into it a little more. In the last round, Joe was screwed by everyone else bidding low, giving him a share that he really didn’t want, and pushing his cash expenditure high enough that it meant he automatically came last.

Martin 44
Katy 29
Steve 28
Joe 0

Ian, Sam and I played new Azul, where the famous square tiles have been replaced by diamond shapes that fit into flower-shaped areas for points and prestige. The method is the same, with players collecting one colour at a time from a set of seven “factories” in the centre. Except that this time, to place a tile, you have to pay for it: a tile the yellow space “6” costs six yellow tiles: the one you actually put down and five more you discard. Add to this the fact that each round one of the colours can be used as a Wild Tile, and you can use them to pay for any colour.

It was okay. Not an instant classic but maybe, with familiarity, certain strategies will become obvious. This time, with three relative newbies, it was like three single-player games with little attempt as spoiling other people’s plans. I completed three of the flower shape things, and was rewarded handsomely.

Andrew 124
Sam 104
Ian 78

At this point we gave Joe a present, cake and card for his 50th birthday (which, as he pointed out, isn’t just yet) and sang “Happy Birthday” to him. Hopefully we were making a great impression on our debutante.

Next we chose again: Sam, Martin, Ian and I went for Babylonia and Katy, keen to impress the newbie, wanted to play Biblios and asked “What’s that game where you have to eat shit?” (referencing our by-now legendary variant: Extreme Biblios) but instead the Katy, Steve and Joe played L.A.M.A. until Adam arrived.

Steve 18
Joe 34
Katy 38


After that Joe, Katy, Steve and Adam chose Down Force, the exciting racing and betting game. Joe picked up his card for a single pound, and then bet on no one but himself. And he then came first. With these circumstances, a distant win is assured.

Joe 29
Adam 9
Katy 8
Steve 3

In Babylonia, we had an odd map, with a swathe of agricultural land splitting two groups of cities apart. I grabbed an early ziggurat and went from five available tiles to seven. Sam went big on cities, swooping in with his “two turns” power to pick up three in one go and, hence, and therefore was raking it in whenever someone triggered the city scoring.

Sam 133
Martin 122
Andrew 110
Ian 107

And as Down Force ended, we broke out Hurlyburly and spent a few happy minutes twanging small wooden cubes at each other's tower of cards. Ian and Sam went super defensive, with Sam's sandbag defences slightly taller than his one-storey tower.

But it was I who sprang up to four floors on my turn and avoided any hits from Sam (had no blocks), Martin (too far away) and Ian (blocks didn't bounce straight). Victory!

Finally we finished with Wavelength. After explaining it to Steve, Sam then went off piste with an audacious clue. For "Fantasy / Sci Fi" he said "High Fidelity by Nick Hornby."Ii scoffed that it was neither fantasy nor science fiction but, you see, that was the whole point. He was aiming for the middle. How smart.

I misunderstood my spectrum of "Good / Bad superpower." I thought it meant political superpower and not, as everyone else thought when they saw it, a special ability. As such my clue of "The British Empire" caused some surprise. We still got close enough to score, though. And a quick nod towards Ian’s clue of “vacuum cleaners” for the spectrum “un/reasonable phobia” in that the more we discussed it,the more reasonable it seemed.

It was a close game. We'd agreed to play until everyone had a go. The score was 10 - 7 as we entered our final turn. We needed a direct hit to win. It was all down to clue-giver Adam. The spectrum was “Has a bad/good reputation” and he chose Barack Obama. Amazingly, we got it spot on for the full four points.

Adam, Joe, Ian, Andrew 11
Steve, Martin, Sam, Katy 10

And so we ended. We were getting ready to go when Sam shushed everyone quiet while he recorded the farty sound of the lid being slid onto the Wavelength box. "Not in front of the new guy," said Katy despairingly. What an evening.

Punch, Kick, It's All In The Mind

This week's games night saw a steadily shifting number of players around Sam's kitchen table, all vying to be the best.

We (Martin, Katy, Joe, Stanley, Sam & Joe, Ian, Adam and I) began with a recent Knizia. What new ideas would he bring to the table this time? Well... ones that vaguely resemble his old ideas, truth be told. The game was Karate Tomate and is a trick taking game whose defining features are (a) a general lack of cards unless you drop out of a round early so you can pick some up and (b) player with least kitchen knives automatically loses.

It was pretty smart. Trying to judge when to not bet was interesting because if too many drop out at the same time, then those remaining can pick up trophies and knives for next to nothing.

The theme, though, barely made any sense. Something to do with tomatoes and needing knives to see off your opponents' vegetables? It kind of reminded me of Parappa the Rapper, the old PS1 game with an onion that sang martial arts advice to you (which explains the blog title), but otherwise it was pretty tenuous. I’m a little surprised they didn’t go for a Karate/Carrot-e pun, but maybe that had already been done.

Joe 13
Adam 12
Sam and Joe 9
Martin 8
Andrew 7
Ian 5
Katy and Stanley had joint fewest knives.

Then Joe junior went to bed and the rest of us split into two groups. Martin, Adam and Katy played Res Arcana, an engine building game with a kind of fantasy theme. (Why on earth was Martin playing it?) The rest of us (Stanley, Ian, Sam, Joe and me) played Down Force, the exciting game of betting and racing.

Stanley picked up two cars in the opening round. Would this be his undoing? The rest of us had one car each. Also, Stanley kept getting distracted by Res Arcana being played next to him. He even gave Katy some helpful advice.

On Down Force, Joe played a clever but frustrating game whereby he was twice able to put his car at the start of a chicane so the rest of us had to begrudgingly move it in order to get past. It was hardly in the spirit of F1, but was probably how the game is meant to be played: hitting those sweet spots to make everyone else move you along.

But Stanley's orange car sped off into the lead in the second half of the race, knocking Joe's blue car into second. My yellow came in third. Sam was slightly embarrassed by his betting choices pushing his score into negative numbers while Joe showed an admirable sense of confidence by betting only on himself. Meanwhile, Res Arcana hadn't been as much of a distraction for Stanley as we might have wanted.

Stanley 23
Joe 17
Andrew 7
Ian 5
Sam -1

Res Arcana was still ongoing so Joe introduced us to Nyet. This trick taking card game is a strange beast, with a slightly different set of rules each round and teams that are decided at the start of each round. Intriguing and a bit baffling as we got hung up on the definition of Super Trumps.

We only had time to play one round and it was much more straightforward once you started playing it. The teams were Ian and me against Sam and Joe and thanks to a flurry of loot cards in our tricks, Ian and I won.

Ian and me 48
Sam and Joe 36

Res Arcana finished after all that mucking about with Calm and Elan

Martin 10
Adam 7
Katy 3

Martin credited his victory with filling up the Catacombs of the Dead. Whatever that means.

At this point, Adam left too. A very early departure for someone who was generous enough to bring two different snacks and so early that he missed the BBQ Beef Hula Hoops. Now we were down to six so seats were swapped and groups reformed. Katy, Ian and Joe played Hit Z Road and Martin, Sam and I went back in time to the Roman Empire in a game of Senators.

We played with the support cards this time, little game breaking things that offer you an advantage but can be embezzled away by your opponents.

We played twice. In game one, Martin raced into an early lead and looked good for a strong game when a fourth war occurred and we were suddenly done. Not to be dissuaded, we cheekily shuffled that fourth war card back into the pack and kept playing. But Lady Luck will not be fooled and after barely a couple of turns, the fourth war card popped up again. This time we took the hint.

Martin 8
Sam 5
Andrew 4

We set up again for another try. This time we seeded one of the five war cards in the second half of the deck. Hopefully this would give us a decent amount of time.

Meanwhile, in post zombie apocalypse America, Ian was already down to his last two survivors.

In Senators Mark II, Sam had a support card that gave an extorter an additional five coins before extorting for the other players. So, obviously, Sam was a little Roman mafioso, taking full advantage of his power. Meanwhile Martin also extorted every round, trying to get the card off Sam. I didn't, since I needed resources (I even sung “dwindling resources” to the tune of “Waltzing Matilda”) so I could cash in but never got much luck.

And, yet again, the fourth war seemed to come round sooner than we were expecting. Martin was happy because he'd just cashed in and used a consul card to steal a senator from Sam, pushing him into first, when the game ended.

Martin 8
Sam 6
Andrew 5

With Katy, Joe and Ian still staggering through the landscape of the undead, we fired off a quick two round game of Maskmen. Finally a game I won, but I made no notes at all. I do remember Sam saying he knew he'd lost round one when he had a hand of mostly two colours and those were both played by Martin and I first, effectively making them the weakest suits.

Andrew 2
Martin 1
Sam 1

In Hit Z Road, Ian's valiant last stand against zombies ended as you might expect in a zombie film with another twenty minutes to run. Joe, on the other hand, had all of his survivors intact. Katy's last two survivors died and then she too ended up as nothing but a name in the final credits. This meant Joe, with his gang of zombie-proof friends, won instantly.

Joe, alive and kicking
Katy and Ian, kicked the bucket

It was late but enough time for a big friendly game for all of us. Perudo or Just One? Those were the choices. The voting went to two rounds before Just One was eliminated and old favourite Perudo was chosen.

Ian followed up his Hit Z Road storyline of dying young with a repeat performance in Perudo. After him, I was next to Palafiko (spelling? Still not sure) but didn’t go out. Instead I clung on while first Martin then Joe went out. Then finally I was vanquished so that the real battle could commence: Sam versus Katy, three dice each.

Katy lost two quickly but when it came to palafiko her bid of “one six” won: Sam had rolled himself three fives! Then Sam went down to one die but there’s not palafiko on 1 vs 1, so when Katy bid One Six, he knew he was doomed with his one five.

Katy wins!
Sam next,
Andrew next,
Joe next,
Martin next,
Ian last.

By now it was eleven and as we were packing up, Texas Jim came in from the next room. This old stalwart of pre-GNN poker nights was visiting and had come in to see what all the laughter and jollity was. Alas, the laughter was ending and I felt a pang of regret that we didn’t have enough in us for one last game.

But we really didn’t. Thanks to Sam for hosting and thanks to all for attending.

We’ll always have Powys

GNN games weekends are the semi-regular binge of board games that allow us to experience things that simply wouldn't happen during a typical evening session. Such as a hungover Ian trying to sleep in a nook by a window while all around him is chaos, or Katy swearing loudly at noon or my attempt at playing a dense, convoluted eurogame while also making pizzas.

It all began on Friday. I got a lift there with Sam and Stanley. We off at four o'clock, and the journey was pretty straightforward, taking about an hour. No such luck for Joe and Katy who had left Bristol at one, but managed to get lost three times, meaning it took them three hours. "We were so lost, we found a games shop in Monmouth," explained Joe.

Either way, when we arrived at Crickhowell (in Powys), Joe Katy, Hannah, Adam and Arthur were already there. And, far from chucking our stuff into rooms and getting straight down to some serious gaming, we stood around and chatted, apparently oblivious to the neat stacks of games in the corner of the room.

The earliest sign of our competitive spirit was a brief spell on the table tennis table while Joe and Katy cooked. After a delicious meal, we finally started gaming with Bandu. Stanley impressed us with his withering look since Katy made no allowances for his young age, handing him some terrible pieces.

Adam
Joe
Sam
Stanley /Andrew
Katy

This was followed by Hannah beating Joe and Katy (77, 71, 68 respectively) at Isles of Skye, and Sam beating Stanley, me and Adam (130, 128, 112, 107) at Ethnos, with its irritating base-60 score track.

Ethnos

During these games, Steve and Jon arrived (Jon, without Power Grid! For shame) and kids were put to bed. There were a couple of games of Happy Salmon, an action game that involves drawing cards and then trying to find someone else around the table who has the same action, while everyone else is doing the same. It looks absurd, and the silent version doubly so, but it seemed popular throughout the weekend.

At first, we split into two groups of four, for Ticket To Ride and Clans Of Caledonia on offer. Then Jon made the switch across the table to TtR, leaving Clans as a three-player affair.

This was possibly a wise move, since even as a three-player (two of whom were novices) Clans of Caledonia lasted a long time. Long after Ticket to Ride ended, and they were deep into Tumblin’ Dice.

Ticket To Ride
Hannah 176
Jon 164
Joe 138
Katy 113
Steve 92

Tumblin’ Dice
Jon 138
Joe 112
Katy 102
Steve 39

Two remarkable an inexplicable defeats for Steve, who only escaped negative points in Tumblin’ Dice in the final round.

Clans of Caledonia was a struggle for me, and I probed the various options with all the timidity of a man pushing a button in a wall, convinced it would open a trapdoor under his feet. Adam, despite yawning through most of the rules explanation, had a much better idea about what was going on.

Adam 136
Sam 127
Andrew 89

By now it was late, and travel-weary and somewhat tipsy, we all got together for a game of Dead Man’s Chest, the game where explaining the rules is never quite enough. Steve and Jon were newbies, and they seemed as baffled as we once were. And sometimes still are.

As for the game, it had three Dead Man rolls (i.e., a one and two). One of which cost me a life on the very first roll of the game. Then the next two both hit Joe, one of which he opened by accident (“Oh. I looked.”). Sam finished in first, with both lives still intact.

Sam
Joe
Katy
Jon
Steve
Andrew

That was that for day one. On Saturday morning, people arose in the following order: Hannah, Stanley and Arthur at 7.30 (probably earlier), then me, Jon, Joe, Sam, Katy, Steve and then a big gap before Adam finally emerged at 9.45. The first game to be played, after all the various breakfasts, didn’t get going until 10.25, and it was Junk Art.

Steve 16
Adam 13
Joe 9
Katy 7

Meanwhile, Jon introduced me to Patchwork and won 15-2, but I was impressed by the game. Ian was collected from the station by Sam and they played a tight game of Heck Meck with Ian winning 13-12.

Next up was a true challenge: A Feast For Odin. Adam, Stanley, Ian and I all set off on this epic undertaking. Adam, though, had a trick up his sleeves: the rules. He’d watched a review or two and noticed that no one else builds up from the corner as we do, and he discovered that that rule only applied to calculating the income. Everything else was a free-for-all.

I had suggested playing a six-round game, but Adam quickly insisted on a seven-round one. I didn’t think anything about this at the time but looking back I remember that, although Adam had populated two islands, his main player board had almost no minus points covered during round six. Without that seventh round, things could’ve been very different. But we did have a seventh round, so things were all too familiar.

I went for animals, Stanley went pillaging and Ian started slow before suddenly filling his board with blue tiles.

Adam 111
Stanley 86
Ian 72
Andrew 65

In the kitchenette area, a game of Downforce was played, with the general consensus that the two-car strategy was a non-starter, with the eight-wheeled Jon and Steve trailing.

Sam 27
Joe 14
Steve 11
Jon 7

Steve was keen to get back on this horse, as it were, and another (five player) game of Downforce was set up. Again, Steve ended up with two cars, although I don’t think he had planned it that way. The race ended with both of his cars still on the track, racing each other for fifth place, until Steve ran out of cards and they both ended with a DNF.

Katy 24
Jon 20
Ian 18
Andrew 17
Steve 6

At this time, a game of Flipships was underway with Hannah, Joe, Stanley and Sam trying to keep the invading aliens at bay. My notes for this game read simply “Earth died.”

Meanwhile, Steve taught Katy and Jon the card game Tenbo. Possibly because he likes it or possibly because he wanted a game he knew he’d do well in.

Steve 21
Katy 15
Jon 13

Then, if last night’s Clans of Caledonia weren’t enough of a warning, I allowed myself to be recruited to another long game beginning with a hefty rules explanation: Yokohama. Even though I’d played it before and had some idea of what it entailed, I needed a rule refresher as much as the two beginners: Steve and Jon. Joe was the rules-explainer, but even he’d forgotten a great deal, and the rule book was never far from hand.

Yokohama

During Yokohama, Ian, Katy and Hannah comfortably played two medium sized games: Mad King Ludwig (Ian 95, Katy 89, Hannah 63) and Hit Z Road (Ian and Katy both survived – I don’t recall who won – but Hannah died early on).

Also Sam and Stanley played Near and Far. According to my notes, it was a draw.

As for me, I had to start making pizzas while still playing Yokohama. This made things difficult, not least because the layout of the kitchen meant a lot of walking back and forth, and I had to keep washing my hands before making my move.

My efforts at making pizza outlasted the game, and lead to a largely game-free period as people got their food one after the other. The scores for Yokohama were:

Jon 116
Steve 111
Joe 78
Andrew 60

The last of the food was being served (and thanks to Joe for knocking together some burritos to make up the shortfall in my pizzas) at nine o’clock and some restless gamers were after some gaming.

Hannah, Katy, Joe and I chose Lords of Vegas while the others set up a much-requested (by Stanley) game of Captain Sonar. Captain Adam, Steve and Jon were up against Captain Stanley, Sam and Ian. This game ended with a victory for Captain Stanley after Radio Operator Steve admitted he missed one of their movements and, from then on, didn’t know where the other submarine was.

In Lords of Vegas, it was a surprisingly swingy game. Katy started well, building lots of one-tile casinos of many colours, but then stalled as she couldn’t convert them to two-tile casinos quickly enough. So Joe took over, surging into a lead. But then he was undone by some reorganising from Katy and especially Hannah, who reduced his previously presidential presence in a five-tile casino to two miserable one-pip dice. I, meanwhile, faced early frustration in the lack of brown casinos paying out. My luck turned towards the end but too little, too late.

Hannah 40
Andrew 36
Joe 26
Katy 23

With Stanley off to bed, the other five played Tortuga. Ian won. “He was Dutch” says my not very helpful notes. “Everyone else lost. Weird conversation about nationalities” it continues.

Tortuga

People slowly peeled away to bed, leaving six players refusing to buckle under the weight of fatigue. Myself, Jon, Joe, Steve, Katy and Ian stayed up for more. And, just like last night’s Dead Man’s Chest, we chose to introduce Steve and Jon to a game that never seems to make sense, no matter how much you try to explain it. Namely, Bemused.

Ian pours himself a beer for Bemused

This game of adopting personas is more an event than a game. A chance to throw insults at people according to which muse they’ve been dealt. Painter, Thespian, Actor (who, invariably, is accused of never being able to play The Dane), Musician, etc. This time, though, I was the Dancer and I must’ve been pretty good since I was largely ignored. I made no secret of my animosity to my gemina, the musician (Jon), because no one else was going after him. And it worked. I finished the game sane and healthy, with my gemina safely “not sane” (i.e., dead, in this case. Actually killed by Katy, who finished him off while Jon was having a rule explained by to him by Joe. Harsh).

Andrew 8
Joe 6
Katy 5
Jon 3
Ian 3
Steve 2

Midnight had come and gone, but we all felt we had one more game in us. Katy asked for something she could play while lying on the sofa under a blanket. Joe suggested I Crossed The Border. This is a simple word game where one person thinks of a rule regarding things that people can take across a border. They then give an example of it, followed by everyone else trying to get stuff across the border. The rule-maker tells them if they’re successful or not. And we go round and round until one person is still clueless.

For example, Joe’s first rule was “Words with ‘oo’ in them” so “I crossed the border with a pair of boots” would be fine but “I crossed the border with a copy of Vogue magazine” would not.

Katy chose items that began with K, A, T or Y. Ian’s rule was that you had to have your hand against the side of your face when you crossed the border. Jon’s rule was don’t hesitate when you cross the border, which I totally failed to get.

My rule was that you had to say the item with a rising inflexion, like a question. Oddly, this meant Ian did very well at crossing the border, since he always framed his crossings as questions, whereas the others were more confident and made their crossings as statements. As such, Ian crossed back and forth, but never really knew why but the others didn’t. It wasn’t until Katy got it that it slowly dawned on the others what we were doing.

We ended at 1.10 on Sunday morning before we tore ourselves away from the buzz of competitive conversation and went to bed.

Sunday morning, and we slowly crawled from our rooms. The first game was played before 9 o’clock so, in that respect, we did better than Saturday. But the game in question was the lightest of games: The Pyramid’s Deadline, a new game I’d bought in Japan from Oink Games (Deep Sea Adventure, Fake Artist, Insider).

It involves building a pyramid-y shaped structure before the pharaoh dies (indicated by the last red square being chosen). The selection of building materials is determined by the roll of some dice, so obviously the speed at which the red squares deplete is random.

This might be why in game one, none of us (Hannah, Sam and me) completed our “pyramid”. Then in game two, Hannah was too cautious since both Sam I and completed our buildings after her, and I won. But, then again, in the third round Hannah won when neither Sam nor I finished.

By 9.15 everyone except Adam was up. Well, Ian was up, but seemed to be in constant danger of falling back down again as he struggled under a hangover.

At some point around now, I introduce Steve to The Pyramid’s Deadline, but I made no notes about the outcome.

Eventually, Katy took pity on Ian’s attempts at a nap on a window seat, and arranged for him to get some sleep in a proper bed (rather than the mattress in the utility room he’d had during the night).

Then we played Deep Sea Adventure. At least, Joe, Steve, Katy and I did. We began quickly and it wasn’t until it was Steve's turn that he asked for a rules explanation. It hadn’t occurred to us that he hadn’t played before!

Luckily DSA is the kind of game you can explain while you play, so it didn’t hold the game up too much. There was a remarkable lack of drownings, apart from Katy and I in round three.

Joe 42
Steve 35
Andrew 24
Katy 13

Sam, Stan and Jon played Near and Far, with Stan running out a clear winner, but that didn’t stop Sam from saying he’d enjoyed it more than the other night when he and Stan had tied for first.

Stanley 79
Sam 42
Jon 38

Next up was a game of Downforce. I ended up with three cars in my team, which was not my plan even if I had boasted beforehand that it was. If two cars is a curse, then surely three cars is a death wish! But, no! Thanks to some clever betting and keeping an early lead, I did okay. Not first, but pretty good.

My team in Downforce

Sam 13
Andrew 12
Ian 10
Stanley 8

While this was happening, another game of Yokohama was being played. Joe was keen to try it again while the rules were still fresh and he was confident that he could teach it better this time, too. Katy was drafted in to the game, along with last night’s conscripts Steve and Jon.

They kept saying it’d be quicker than last night, and maybe it was. But not by much. After Downforce had ended, Sam and I played Clans of Caledonia again. It was much quicker as a two player, and I did better, too.

Sam 126
Andrew 118

Hannah put together salad and cold meats and cheese for lunch. Still Yokohama kept going.

People started getting anxious about not having enough time for a walk. But Yokohama wouldn’t be rushed.

Finally it ended. Scoring was calculated, and it turned out to be the same person who won last time!

Jon 123
Joe 98
Steve 95
Katy 91

After that, it was time for the walk before being ferried back to Bristol by Sam. Five other gamers stayed on for one more evening, and I hope they’ll add their comments to the end of this post.

Meanwhile, thanks all. It was special!

A bird! In the sky!

Adam reports the final scores...

Capital lux
Joe 80
Adam 65
Hannah 39




Mysterium


We all won. But I won most and Katy won second most. Because we're overcompetetive. Joe was an excellent ghost.

Ticket to ride
Adam 178
Hannah 161
Katy 145
Joe 142
Jon 138


Apparently Katy isn't going to play with Hannah or I ever again.


Kingdomino
Jon 53
Adam 51
Katy 46
Joe 29




Team play
Adam & Joe 25
Katy & Jon 24

Good night folks!