Technical Difficulties

After last week's blogger-less games night, which is lost to history without a written record, six gamers (Joe, Ian, Adam H, Katy, Martin and myself) sat at their computers to do virtual battle once more.

But for much longer? Katy told us that she and Joe had played a real game, face to face, recently. Is this the first sign of life beyond the lockdown?

We were waiting for Andy who was expected in fifteen minutes so we tried talking for a bit. But as the time approached, we regretted not playing a quick game. We decided that he wouldn't mind watching for a while so we banged out a quick game of 7 Wonders.

Joe struggled with money but that might have been because he only had three resources and two of them were wood. Martin had lots of resources but still found himself unable to build much.

Adam 65
Joe 51
Ian 49
Martin 48
Katy 43
Andrew 39

Bang on cue, Andy arrived and we split into two groups. Adam, Martin and Joe played Race For The Galaxy. I did keep an eye on it but I understood nothing.

Martin 68
Joe 23
Adam 18

Andy, Katy, Ian and I chose Colt Express as an amusing slice of gaming. But it was short lived. At the start of the second round, after an eventful opener where Ian punched and shot Katy, Andy suddenly vanished. We waited for him to reconnect and then Sam arrived. We chatted and waited and after fifteen minutes we quit the game after we found out we couldn't start a new one until Colt Express was finished.

By this time, Martin popped in to make sure I'd got the details of his impressive win. Andy returned and we split into two new groups. Sam, Martin, Andy and Ian played American Bookshop. I know little else about it.

We played Tichu. Eventually.

First, Adam set up a table but didn't password protect it and a bunch of strangers sat there. Abandoning that, Joe made a new table but left a timer on. Again we changed tables (and Joe changed the web browser) and finally we got our own password protected timer-free table.

We began with Joe calling Grand Tichu immediately, reminding his partner Katy that this meant she should give his best card. He would have done it too except for three bombs at the table; his, mine Adam's.

Joe made amends in the next round, completing a Tichu, but then Adam successfully did a Grand Tichu with a 1-2 finish, netting us 400 points. Joe then completed another Tichu and then suggested we finish at 500 points. With the score at 495 - 205 Adam and I readily agreed. Joe called Tichu and Katy admitted that she wanted to call Tichu but now had to lose, a concept she was unfamiliar with. Joe mentioned if they go out 1-2 with the Tichu, then they'd win. But I had meant to call Tichu but had forgotten to press the right button. So I had a good hand and was able to take the win, ending on a bomb, for style.

I had the dragon, phoenix, three queens and a bomb. Possibly should've called Tichu

Andrew and Adam 570
Joe and Katy 130

American Bookshop had ended too, so while I was on a toilet break, Sam and Joe bade us farewell. When I came back, we remaining six chose For Sale as a quick six-player hit. Katy seemed reluctant, apparently believing this to be her gaming nemesis but this time she did better than she was expecting.

Andrew 52
Ian 49
Martin 46
Adam 43
Katy 41
Andy 34

A second game was agreed upon, and Katy’s gradual improvement continued.

Martin 50
Andrew 49
Adam 47
Katy 42
Andy 40
Ian 38

Finally we chose Perudo as our nightcap. Martin was keen to go to bed and went out quickly. He didn’t go, though, preferring to watch until the end. And what an end it was! The final two were Adam (5 dice) versus Katy (2 dice) and I’m still not sure what happened but Adam got himself into a death spiral. All the more astonishing after playing such a perfect game. Admittedly he pretty much threw away one die: when it was 2 dice each, Adam bid 3 twos. In other words, If Katy had no twos or aces, she could dudo with confidence. Which she did. A schoolboy error from Adam.

Katy 2 dice left
Adam
Andy
Andrew
Martin

And so that was that. Good nights were spoken and connections broken. See you next week!

Can't Stop/Can Stop

I (Sam) was late to GNN last night, and had the unique experience of listening to the end of a game of Can't Stop where the only available numbers left were 2,3,4 and 5. Ian, Katy, Martin and Adam H were all going repeatedly bust and the swear-meter was up at eleven. Eventually Katy won - not sure what the other positions were.

Katy - can stop!

8pm was nearly upon us and duly Adam T, Anja and Steve appeared. Joe remained, for now, mysteriously absent. We embarked on a game of Codenames with Ian clueing for Steve, Anja and Adam T. I was spymaster for Martin, Katy, and the enigmatic Adam H. Both teams began with a solid 2 correct guesses each, then we (Blue) pulled slightly into the lead when Ian's clue of Mount Rushmore led to an incorrect guess of Washington.

Both Ian and I were slightly bamboozled by the amount of water-related words on the grid with me trying to clue sink/pirate/stream and Ian well. Fortunately we ticked off horn and swing thanks to jazz - it's not often I say thanks to jazz - and then Ian's clue of shaft gave us a single word to finish the game off:

Martin/Katy/Adam H/Sam - Masters of Cold War

Around this point Joe materialised, but barely had time to say hello before he was led off for a game of Tichu with Ian, Katy and Martin. No idea what happened there - the rest of us, after another bout of elusiveness from Adam H, went off to play Taluva. This hasn't been seen on a GNN Tuesday night since the olden days, before so many things that happened, that I needed a refresher that amounted to a first-teach.

Fortunately Adam T, Steve and Anja had all played recently, and the only person who'd never played before was Adam H, who - inevitably? - won anyway. I'm blaming distractions of two roaming children, and the moon out the window.

I have to apologise because I struggled to get what any kind of strategy was and halfway through the game began to fall asleep, to the point where I asked if it was feasible to bail, and put enough social pressure on Steve as a result that he rushed his final few turns. Who knows what might have been had I kept my mouth shut? Sorry Steve. I remembered Taluva as a fairly dainty game but I now suspect I only ever played it 2-player with Joe. Five was a different beast.

Adam H - wins
Everyone else - loses, thanks to Sam

At this point I fell into bed and therefore missed whatever drama was about to unfold... I hope the comments will tell a better story than mine, which was Sally waking me at 3am because I was snoring so loudly.

This is beef shit

As is usual, I arrive late for our now-normal virtual games night and I'm into a six player game of For Sale (against Martin, Adam T, Katy, Ian and Sam) before I've even worked out how to get the chat working in Discord.

You would think that playing the first game mute and deaf would be an advantage since I'd have fewer distractions, but no. I came last.

Katy 59
Martin 55
Sam 51
Ian 40
Adam 38
Andrew 37

We were waiting for Joe to arrive and, as I manage to get things working my end, we decide to play For Sale again. Adam managed to get invited into someone else's game which he then had to leave, while regretting that this would probably spoil his "good" rating.

This time most of us that Katy was winning during the game since she picked up two, maybe three, high cards in the bidding phase but instead we had the closest result I think we've ever seen on For Sale, with both first and last being decided by tie breakers.

Ian 44 (more cash)
Martin 44 (no cash)
Katy 43
Andrew 41
Sam 40 (more cash)
Adam 40 (less cash)

Then Joe arrived and we decided to play Codenames. At this point Andy B (otherwise distracted by an online gig) was seen on Discord and our Google Hangouts but, although he could see the Codenames board, he couldn't hear us or speak to us, which is kind of vital. As it was, he went back to his gig (or to his riverside beer, if his avatar was anything to go by) and the rest of us carried on with our uneven teams.

Adam, Ian and I were in a comfortable 4-2 lead when we passed, thinking that they'd never get four clues in one go. Upsettingly, Martin's clue of "playground, three” got them across the line.

Martin, Joe, Katy, Sam, win
Adam, Ian, Andrew, don't


Then the seven of us played good old 7 Wonders. Katy had only played it once before and got a lightning fast rules refresher that left her with only twenty seconds left on the clock to make her first move.

Joe remarked in round three that he had fewest points and no money. A tricky situation. Plus, he was in a long and bloody war against Sam. Other noteworthy tactics were Ian's love of science and Adam's fondness for bricks. I went down the pacifist route until round three but it was Martin's recourse-light approach the won the day.

Martin 69
Andrew 54
Adam 54
Ian 50
Sam 46
Katy 45
Joe 45

After 7 Wonders we took it down a notch and played 6nimmt. We remarked that the negative points you pick up during the game actually have names: beef heads. Or, to be exact, beef head(s). Adam was particularly peeved by this short cut, pointing out that it only needed one extra line of code to differentiate between one beef head and multiple beef heads. The game clearly took offence at this as he received plenty much beef head(s).

But never mind beef head(s), “this is beef shit,” Joe cursed as another pile of head(s) rolled into his lap and Ian must have felt the same as he picked up 21 in one go. Martin ended up a winner with Katy appalled that she didn’t even manage second, despite leading for so long.

Martin 47 points remaining
Andrew 34
Katy 33
Sam 21
Ian 10
Joe 7
Adam -10

Then Katy, Joe and Sam left. The remaining four of us considered Quantum, but decided it was too late. Instead we went for a 500 point game of Tichu. I was teamed with Martin while approx newbie Adam was paired up with Ian. As we began Martin made the observation that in the last two games he’d played online, one the the two teams ended up with minus points.

Adam’s mix of innocence and bravado caused him to call Tichu on his first hand, only to discover the trick he wanted to start with was illegal. He immediately began to voice second thoughts. I, on the other hand, had a dream hand: a high full house, three tens, a straight flush bomb, and a two. I also called Tichu and went out easily.

In round two, Ian failed his Tichu and Martin succeeded on his, meaning the scores were 470 to -170. With only thirty points separating Martin and I from victory, Adam decided it was time to make some bold moves. He called Grand Tichu. He failed, but Martin and I only scored twenty points that round and the game extended into one final (surely) round. Ian called Grand Tichu and failed, with his team mate Adam actually going out first when it was clear that Ian wasn’t going to do it.

Martin and Andrew 565
Ian and Adam -465

What a remarkable way to end another remarkable evening. Thanks all.

I hear you knocking

Another week of social distancing means another week of logging into Discord and taking advantage of the internet's ability to entertain.

There were nine of us. Ian, Katy, Martin, Joe (trying to download Discord to his Mac because his phone was dying), Steve, Anja, Sam, Adam H, and me. With such high numbers, we decided to play 6nimmt. It was available on Board Game Arena, but one of us needed to be a premium member in order to set up a game and invite the rest of us to join.

Ian was impressed enough by the site to put his hand into his pocket and he invited us all to join him as we registered one by one. Whenever someone accepted the invitation, it was accompanied by a knocking noise that Joe found unsettlingly creepy and it did indeed sound like something you’d hear coming from the next room while exploring an abandoned log cabin.

The set up was all going pretty smoothly until Anja joined. Suddenly the site threw up a warning that two players had the same IP address. This is not allowed, due to the risks of cheating. Unless you're a subscriber, in which case it's fine. Anja dutifully paid the membership fee and suddenly the site went from sneering accusations to complimenting her moral integrity. Money talks.

The game played out as you’d expect. Death spirals, hopeless situations (such as the only available space being the one after the highest card 104) and impossibly lucky escapes. Katy bemoaned her bad luck but that was mostly because she couldn’t work out if she’d actually picked up cards or not. Turns out she did okay.

Katy 47 (points left out of 66)
Steve 45
Ian 35
Martin 30
Sam 18
Anja 8
Adam 8
Andrew 2
Joe -1

Then we split into groups, after Steve vetoed the idea of him and Anja playing as a team in Incan Gold. Katy, Martin, Joe and I chose Tichu, at Katy’s suggestion while the others played… Incan Gold. Of course.

Since they stayed on Discord and we decamped to Google Hangouts, I have no idea what happened on the other “table” but here are the scores:

Sam 31
Adam 22 (least thinky, according to the website)
Ian 19
Anja 15 (most thinky)
Steve 13

They also played Codenames, but I know nothing about that.

As for Tichu, Katy needed a rules refresher, so it was very good that Martin made sure to turn the timer off. Joe and I took full advantage of Katy’s cautiousness and ran into a 250-50 lead after round two. Then Katy called Tichu and handed the Dragon card to Martin, causing him to erupt with bafflement (if such a thing is possible). But after a tricky start, they came back into it and actually got within one card of winning (Martin had completed his Tichu and Katy just had one card to put down for a 1-2 finish) but Joe and I just got across the line.

J & A 490
M & K 410

Then Sam, Joe and Steve all left so the remaining gamers all gathered on Google Hangouts and played Just One.

We didn’t do nearly as well as last time, and it’s probably best if we skip over any details, but I will mention Katy correctly guessing “Revolution” and crediting Anja’s “Televised” as being the key clue (as opposed to my “Beatles” and Adam’s “Vodka”)

Score: 4 (try again and again…)

And with that we were done. Time to shut down and go straight to bed.

Duplicating pansies

Covid 19 continues to dog the land and so z for the third time, we met up virtually again for our weekly fix. Ian, Katy, Sam, Martin, Joe and myself used the full force of technology to simulate leaving the house.

We began with Codenames using a basic but functional website and it worked pretty well. The teams were Blue (Martin, Sam and me) against Red (Joe, Katy and Ian).

I was called away for the first round to try and fix my girlfriend's monitor and by the time I got back, I discovered Katy and Ian pondering Joe’s clue of “masturbation, two” (the two answers were “hand” and “pants”).

Katy got the yips over clicking on squares to advance the game after she accidentally revealed an opposing team’s clue and all of us had reason to pause over who was clicking what and was it okay to go on. This caused Joe to go into a lengthy reverie about how similar it must be for those manning the button for nuclear missiles. "Shall I do it?" "Now? Is that okay?"

In the last round when I was spymaster, I managed to overlook that fact that “fly” is an insect whereas my intended target “spider” wasn’t. Happily, I managed to recover with clues like “Halo” for “Angel” and “Crown.”

Blue 2
Red 1

After this Sam left for an early night and the remaining five of us eschewed specialised websites and instead played Just One on Google Hangouts. We all got our own stationary and Martin noted that his pen didn’t work properly “which is par for the course in this game.” I duplicated often, which at least gave us two bonus points for correctly guessing the eliminated words. Joe managed to guess (somehow) that, for the clue “flower”, Katy and I both wrote “pansy”. It was suprising enough when I saw Katy had read my mind, but pretty astonishing when Joe did it too.

We did very well. It would’ve been perfect but Katy wasn’t able to match Martin’s clue “greased” with the target word “lightning”. When it was explained that it was a song in the musical Grease, she said she’d always thought it was “Grease Lightning”. How we laughed.

Score: GNN bonus point method: 14. Off the scorechart! Official method: 12. “Incredible!”

Then Katy wanted one more game to play before she went off to watch her gig in twenty minutes. After that, she said, the four of us could go and play Tichu. The silence that followed told her that, actually, she may as well go now. Taking the hint, she departed to spend some quality time with her favourite band.

The remaining four of us upped sticks and set off for a website where we can play Tichu. Early on we ran into an issue: every move was restricted by a timer. Martin didn’t notice and immediately got a “slow play 1/3” warning. This rather strict aspect meant that going to the toilet had to be carefully timed. Next we found another slight issue: Auto-fold meant that the site automatically made a player pass if they didn’t have a hand strong enough to compete.This meant that bluffing was almost impossible. So we turned it off until Joe needed to go to the toilet and he turned it back on again.

But we put these down as minor teething troubles. That was until Ian picked up his third Slow Play warning and the game suddenly ended. And that was that. Nothing we could do - we had just angered the Tichu Gods and there was no button to click to make it all right.

I’m pretty sure that Joe and Martin were winning when the game ended. We then acquainted ourselves with how judgmental the site can be by looking over the list of “cheaters” and “leavers” that are available to peruse on the site. How odd.

But the best thing for me was that I have Tichu on my phone and I changed the names of the AI opponents to Martin, Ian and Joe and here I was in exactly the same situation. They were ever sitting in the same place! Living the dream, baby!

And that was the end of the evening. We turned off our cams and went to bed. Thanks all. Let’s try it all again soon.

Lexicon of Laughs

Eight people squeezed around Joe's kitchen table for the weekly games fest, having walked through Bristol’s indecisive weather which veered from wet to dry and then tried to make amends with a lovely rainbow or two.

Joe, sporting a sizeable scab running along his head but otherwise looking pretty chipper, was joined by Martin, Adam H, Adam T, Katy, Ian, Steve and myself. Katy brought Isle of Skye, "just in case anyone wants to play it," and she placed it prominently on the table (in case anyone wanted to look at it, I suppose). Such deft advertising worked and Ian and Adam H were keen for a game and Steve joined in too.

While the rest of us discussed things, someone mentioned Tichu to which Adam T responded "Did someone mention Tichu?" He was keen for a game, since he'd hadn't played in years.

Joe got out his card table, apologising for the cat hairs on the green felt tabletop. The room buzzed with dual rules explanations while Steve and Adam were brought up to speed, and we began with newbie Adam T paired with Martin and Joe teamed up with me.

New tactic: photo your hand to make people think it's amazing

Joe and me got off to a commanding lead, thanks to me fulfilling a call of Tichu despite Martin and Adam both having bombs. Also, Adam failed a couple of early Tichu calls as he made the error of ending the round with low, unplayable cards left in his hand.

But things started to turn around. Adam got the hang of things and Martin had a very bomb-heavy game. We were still looking good for the win, especially when Joe went out with an instant Tichu, but the gap kept getting narrower.

In the end, they ran out easy winners. Joe felt liked he'd been played by a hustler, such was the way the game played out. All that was missing was for one of them to suggest, when they were 700 points behind, "Say, why don't we make this interesting?"

Martin & Adam T 1080
Joe & Andrew 720

Happily, Isle of Skye was ending at almost the same time. I didn't really follow the game, apart from hearing Katy insist she was having fun despite being in last. When the final count came, perennially last Katy and always-leading Steve had a surprise or two.

Katy's tidy island

Ian 175
Katy 174
Steve 170
Adam 159

With all eight together we discussed our options. Captain Sonar for eight was instantly dismissed by Martin despite him being in another room. Instead we split again, with Tichu making a second appearance, this time with Ian, Adam T, Joe and Adam H. Apart from Joe’s midgame suggestion “Let’s all call Grand Tichu,” I don’t know how the game went, but it ended:

Joe and Adam T won
Ian and Adam H lost

Meanwhile, Martin, Katy, Steve and I played QE. Steve was aghast that there was now a game based on quantitative easing, but he seemed keen to give it a go. I also had reservations, especially due to its comparisons with Ponzi Scheme, but I thought I should give it a fair crack of the whip.

It was okay. Certainly a lot quicker than Ponzi Scheme. Steve (China) and Katy (USA) were the early big buyers and they hoovered up tiles. But Steve gave the impression of having spent more than Katy. In fact, in the last round he put out the final tile for tender at 50,000 only to find that he ended up having to buy it himself. He didn’t realise that was a possibility, but when we added up his money spent, he’d already gone far past the rest of us before that had happened, so it made no difference. Martin (EU) and I (Japan) made some last minute bids that, as it turned out, pushed us past Katy’s spending level, giving her a clear win. “Katy crushed it,” Martin said and Katy insisted I wrote it down.

Katy 41
Martin 30
Andrew 18
Steve OUT! (By miles, but he had 42)

Then we had a quick game of Heul Doch Mau Mau which is something to do with onions. You have to build up a pile of onion cards in front of you but they have to match either the suit or value of the one before and it mustn’t match the suit or colour of either of your neighbours. If it does, then your card must go on that pile, which means it counts towards their score.

But, you can “reset” your pile by playing a card face down – a weeping onion. At the end of the round, count up those onions. That value (say, six) means that any cards of that same value don’t count to your score. As it happens, Steve didn’t get hit by that punishment (nor did I, fat load of use it did me) while Martin lost 24 points.

Steve 91
Katy 77
Martin 74
Andrew 63

It was an odd game. Can’t shake the feeling there’s not enough control involved. Still, I pretty sure I laughed at some point.

At this point Adam T and Ian left, although Ian paused – tempted by the sight of a new word game: Stinker. This game involves each player having a set number of tiles with letters on (23 tiles each, which we thought was impossible with six players, but we ended up with three to spare) and a card giving you a topic about which you have to write an answer. Spelling mistakes are prefectly fine (see what I did there?) and each player has two blank tiles to get them out of a tight spot if they need it. There is a scoring system, but it seemed fairly redundant.

The game was a huge success, reducing most of us to puddles of tears of laughter. “How to avoid boredom,” asked the card. “Wank,” wrote Joe succinctly. My answers were too dull, reaching a peak with the prompt “Where would you go in the past” getting this answer from me:

But others did great work. “Another use for a light saber” was either “Massive Dildo” (Steve) or “Frighten Horses” (Joe). Martin tried to get the word “stinker” into as many responses as he could (i.e., “The perfect crime” = “Cheat at Stinker”).

I wish I’d made notes, but I was laughing too much. Only Adam didn’t seem hugely entertained, but you can’t please everyone can you?

Steve won
So did everyone else
Adam came last (sorry, Adam)

And so, wiping the tears from our eyes, we were done for the night. Two games of Tichu and a blistering debut from a new word game. Thanks for hosting, Joe.

Ones upon a Time Of Crisis

This month’s Time of Crisis meeting began with Joe setting up the game remarking how nice it was to have a game where we don’t need to check the rule book all. The time. Well, there must have been a mischievous troll sitting under Joe’s kitchen table who heard this, as we were pitched into a determinedly odd series of unfortunate events.

It began in typical fashion. Joe went into Gallia, Ian into Pannonia, Martin into Macedonia (of course) and I went to Hispania.

In the Three Blue Two Red round, Joe took Britannia (throwing the deposed neutral governor across the table and onto the floor), Ian took Thracia, Martin took Egypt and I took Africa. So far, so good, although an event card was rolled that sparked inflation, making our already weak yellow cards even weaker.

In the second round, Joe (2R 3Y) found a lone band of Franks on his doorstep in Gallia. He attacked them with his army there and lost, rolling two ones against Frank’s roll of five. He used his yellows to boost support in Gallia which fell straight back down again.

Then Ian (2R 3Y) found that he had two Allamani in the perennially invaded Pannonia. Clearly the barbarians were feeling feisty today. He attacked them but rolled two more ones against the Allamani’s rolls of 6, 4, 4 which wiped out his army stationed there. He used his one remaining red point to put the general straight back in again, though.

Then the Sassanids invaded the otherwise unoccupied Syria. Martin (2R 3Y) bought a general and boosted support, I think. It was quite boring. I (2R 3Y) moved my army from Hispania into Gallia to attack those Franks. It was so unlike me, I did it! And then I rolled yet another one. And so did they. A draw.

Round three and Joe had an odd hand of 1R, 3B, 2Y. That one red point was used to attack those pesky Franks in Gallia with his remaining legion there. He rolled another one! How long was this going to last? The Franks rolled a 5.

Ian (5B, 1R) found himself facing a surprisingly strong neutral emperor. Due to our being distracted by barbarians, the provinces hadn’t fallen as quickly as they usually do. Instead, he got himself voted into Asia and then finally broke the Jinx Of One plaguing Roman military rolls all game when he attacked the Allamani in Pannonia. He still lost, though, but at least he rolled a five.

Six ones in a row comes in at odds of 1 in 46,656 and if those odds were miles that would get you round the Earth almost twice. Astonishing scenes.

Martin (5B, 1R) needed to recruit a governor before getting voted in anywhere so he couldn’t go for Rome either. Instead he got elected in Asia, taking it off Ian. I (3R, 3B) pondered attacking Joe’s weakened army in Gallia. Instead I recruited a governor and then failed my (admittedly unlikely) attempt at getting voted into Galatia, needing two votes with one die. Joe’s crisis roll was a double one (“More ones!” cried Martin), which triggered a new angry barbarian in every homeland. Joe (1R, 2B, 4Y, I think) took Galatia, and repaired his army in Gallia and generally boosted support.

Ian stepped up with 3B, 2R, 3Y and a spare governor. Rome needed four votes. Could he do it? He foederatied an Allamani in Pannonia, moved the army from there to Italia. Now he needed only two votes. He was successfully voted in! Our first Emperor at 20:42. We celebrated with the first of our trilogy of increasingly spicy crisps!

The next crisis roll saw three Nomads pile into Martin’s Egypt. “Well, that changes everything,” grumbled Martin, paying tribute to them, building a second legion there and then attacking them. Two hits each meant that one still hung around at the end of his turn. Then he remembered we had Bad Auguries, subtracting one from Roman military rolls. It made no difference but “I wouldn’t have attacked them if I’d remembered that,” Martin said. And then he chucked a mob into Emperor Ian’s Thracia and built a basilica in Asia. My underwhelming move (3Y 2R) saw me build a basilica in Hispania and move my roaming army from Gallia into Ian’s undefended Pannonia.

The next event was Good Auguries! Hurray! We can fight better! Now Joe built a new legion in Gallia and finally beat those pesky Franks in Gallia. The first time tonight that a Roman army had won a battle, and we’d been playing for almost an hour.

Then another event (we were ploughing through the event deck) saw Palmyra Allies clear the board of Sassanids, leaving Syria free of barbarians. Ian attacked me in Pannonia using the army from Thracia (which he’ll lose to the mob no matter what he does). We rolled at the same time for dramatic effect. We both rolled ones. As battles go, not that dramatic. Ian got himself voted into Syria and finally the last neutral reign ended, but then Thracia went neutral instead. Martin (3R, 2Y 1B) killed the last Nomad in Egypt, moved his army from Macedonia into Thracia and boosted his support there.

Now was my chance! My big move (4R, 4B) that I had planned out. I tried to get voted into Syria, using all four blue points for just two votes. Surely nothing could go wrong. Well, it turns out Lady Luck wasn’t done with us yet as I rolled 1, 1, 1, 3. Just one vote. Disaster. (“You’d have won if you’d chosen Pannonia,” said Martin not at all helpfully) The second part of my plan was to fight Ian in Pannonia since I had a 2 to 1 advantage. But I rolled 1, 2 while he rolled a 5 for a single hit that won a whole battle. A shocking move for me. I refused to buy a card because my hand was already overloaded with level-2 cards and not a single level-3.

Then in the next crisis roll, the Franks invaded in numbers: three into Pannonia (still under Ian’s governorship) and one into Italia (under Ian’s Emperorship). Joe (3R, 3Y, 3B) got himself voted into Syria, built a new army in Galatia and must have done other things too, I don’t know.

By now, both Joe and Martin have level-4 Yellow cards allowing them to set up a Pretender Empire. The crisis roll saw yet more ones, and another Ira Deorum with a new angry barbarian in every homeland. Again. Ian put a mob in Martin’s Asia and attacked Martin’s lone militia in Macedonia. But Ian rolled a 2 while Martin rolled a 5, giving Martin an improbable win. Ian did beat the Franks in Italy, though.

The following crisis roll saw another event and by now it was looking likely that we’d reach the Diocletian card near the end of the deck that would trigger the end of the game. This round’s event was Ludis Seculares allowing the Emperor to discard a card for that amount of points. Ian discarded a level-3 red, pushing him into a significant lead.

At this moment (mid-round) the scores were Ian 31, Martin 21, Joe 19, Andrew 14 (with only Ian getting any Emperor Points at the end). Ian wanted the event deck to play out fast.

Martin’s move (8Y, 3R, 1B) saw him create a Pretender Empire! And he got rid of the mob, putting a mob of his own into Italia. On my turn, I fought the Franks in Pannonia. I avoided rolling ones, but still lost. I did get voted into Pannonia, though, keeping hold of it by boosting support.

Meanwhile, the mischievous troll under the table had possessed Joe’s dog Sybil who was currently disembowelling a cuddly toy. Made for her by Joe’s daughter. How tragic.

The next event was a Priest King in Joe’s Syria. Joe built an army and attacked Sassanids with a flanking manoeuvre. He won. I was distracted by the dog at this point, I’m afraid.

Thanks to the Ludis Seculares earlier, Ian only had four cards in his hand, 2Y, 4B and he had only one province (Italia) with a mob in it, a rival leader and a pretender empire on his hands. He cleared a mob and got voted into Egypt (rolling two ones out of his four dice, but still got enough). Joe brought out some monkey nuts, whose shells made such a mess that Joe had to get the handheld vacuum to clear periodically the table.

There’s another event (Preparing For War) Martin gets voted into Ian’s Egypt with lots of sixes. Ian’s support level in Rome is now on zero. Then he goes after Ian’s army in Macedonia and wins, three hits (from his militia!) against Ian’s two. He’s making this Pretender Empire tactic work.

Then there’s ANOTHER event, as Postumus pops up in Gallia. Ian’s hope of the Diocletian card ending the game before Martin can win might work.

On my go (5B 3Y) I became Emperor because why not. Ian’s entire presence on the board was one solitary army in Italia. Being Emperor didn’t get me much, but I was finally able to buy a level-4 card. Joe recalled a governor from Syria and got voted into Martin’s Egypt. He attacked Postumus in Gallia but neither side landed a hit.

Ian sprang back into action with his four governors in reserve he got voted into Syria, Egypt and then back into Rome! He was emperor again at 22.02 and my nine-minute reign was over, then he killed the Priest King in Syria. The scores now (again, mid-round) were Martin 37, Ian 36, Joe 30, Andrew 24.

Martin took Egypt and put an army in there to stop it changing hands all the time. He then boosted Asia. Meanwhile, the crisis roll sent three Allamani into Pannonia and another one into Italia. Martin’s plan on shoring up support in Egypt didn’t last, as I then moved an army from Africa into Egypt and won the battle there, getting voted in afterwards.

Joe kills Postumus and builds a Basilica before establishing the game’s second Pretender Empire! This level of anarchy had never been seen before, and we had to check the rule book to see if multiple pretender’s score extra legacy points. They don’t. Ian crossed the sea and attacks me in Africa and then killed the Allamani in Italia.

Then Martin, on 44 points, said he thinks he can end the game. With 6B, 4Y, 7R he sent an army across Europe, foederati-ing two barbarians on the way, to attack and defeat Joe’s Seat Of Power in Britannia. Then he became Emperor (on level 5 support!) and killed an Alamanni for 3 points. He did it! He reached 62 points and was Emperor and triggered the end of the game. I just had one move left. I didn’t make any notes about what I did.

Martin 68
Ian 51
Andrew 41
Joe 36

It was still relatively early, so we played Tichu. Ian and I versus Martin and Joe, just like on my phone (I renamed the AI opponents). Martin was lucky enough to have three bombs during the match while I was unlucky enough to have one round where the cards I gave to Martin and Joe gave them both bombs. But after four rounds the scores were so close (260-240) that we had a final round as a decider and Ian and I went out first and second for 200 points and the win.

Ian and Andrew 460
Martin and Joe 240

Phew, what a night.

Giving up the ghost

I write these blog posts on my phone and I like it when the predictive text on my phone suggests words for this report. I feel like I'm getting a glimpse of another reality: in this case, a reality where Simon and Mary joined us for games night this week.

Tonight we were at Joe's and we were six in number: Joe, Martin, Ian, Sam, Adam and me. Sam was running a little late, and Martin made a pitch for Tigris and Euphrates The Card Game but the mood around the table wasn't amenable. Joe brought in a stack of options, with Welcome To Centerville hiding at the bottom. It caught Adam's eye and Martin's description of it as Yahtzee crossed with Sim City didn't put him off so we had to clarify that it had most of the Sim City bits taken out.

When Sam arrived, we still hadn't made a decision. He remarked on Centreville's presence on the table in a tone of voice that suggested he wouldn't be choosing it. Instead we went for a completely different style of game. Mysterium.

In this game of clue giving and deduction, Martin was the ghost. He couldn’t talk to us directly, but his mutterings about how shit his hand was told us that death hadn't changed him.

It's a hard game to describe but, as I recall, Martin The Ghost liked giving clues based on dominant colour, Sam was usually one step behind us in solving his clues and in the final round when we had to choose one scenario out of five, we got it completely wrong, despite spreading our choices across three of them. In fact we hadn't even discussed the correct option at all, much to Martin's annoyance. And, once he'd explained it, his clues did make perfect sense.

In the post-game wind down he also told us that we'd usually start off on the right track with our clues until Adam suggested something wrong.

Martin made another attempt at persuading some of us to play Tigris and Euphrates The Card Game, but with little success. Next up was another six player game: Team Play. Despite their lack of bonding over Mysterium, Adam and Martin paired up. The other teams were Joe & Sam and Ian & me.

It was a close game, and Sam played the eighth trick to trigger the final round. We were all very impressed when, after Joe had handed Sam two cards, Sam was able to complete his last trick (two pairs) with the last play of the game.

Sam & Joe 26
Ian & Andrew 23
Adam & Martin 22

It was still only 9.30 and we wondered what to do next. Sam asked if it was time for another discussion about Tigris and Euphrates The Card Game. Martin, Adam and I went for Azul. Joe went to get some roll and write games and discovered his dog had done plops on the floor again. Oh, Sybil.

They chose Kribbeln for their entertainment, and brought out the Das Exclusive dice arena to host it.

We played out a slow, thinky game of Azul. When tiles were pulled from the bag, there were almost no triples of the same colour on a tile for the whole game. Instead, we had to slowly put together our rows of four and five from the doubles and singles that were available. When Adam went to the toilet, I took the chance to watch some Kribbeln but I noticed Martin, deep in thought, scanning Azul and trying to find the optimum move. And it worked too, as he edged ahead in a close game.

Martin 63
Andrew 57
Adam 54

Kribbeln ended with Joe throwing caution to the wind, trying to catch the runaway leader Sam.

Sam 20
Joe 15
Ian 10

And they also squeezed in a game of Kriss Kross. This roll and write game has an air of Take It Easy about it, as point scoring opportunities are ruined by bad luck. Sam looked to have won it until he remembered a rule and demanded a recount. Such sportsmanship.

Joe 38
Sam 32
Ian 32

Now we were a sextet again, and there was some discussion about the next game. Vegas had been perched on top of a stack of games for the whole evening and I was keen, but instead we chose For Sale. Such a great game and it always throws up a surprise or two. As shuffled decks of cards so often do.

In this game, we had a round of all low cards, a round of all middling cards and a round of all high except one low card. Oh, and Joe picked up the 1 card. No surprises there. Sam’s win was all the more impressive since he picked up a $0 cheque in the second round. All his others were well into double figures.

Sam 51
Adam 50
Martin 45
Joe 38
Ian 36
Andrew 35

After this, Sam and Ian set off home and the remaining four of us pondered how to end the evening. Someone suggested Tichu and since we all knew the rules, we all agreed. The thought of starting a game Tichu at 10.30 was almost too exciting and GNN hasn't seen such decadence since that time we started Lords Of Vegas after nine o'clock.

It was, of course, a shortened game of just four hands. Martin and Adam overturned their previous poor form and ran into a 500 - 0 lead by the end of round two. Thankfully, Joe flexed his Tichu muscles and put us back into more respectable territory. He called Grand Tichu in round four because "why not?" and he made it too. Martin's failed bid of Tichu in that same round dragged them back towards us making the score look even better.

Martin and Adam 510
Joe and Andrew 390

And finally we were done. What an evening, and what a finale. Thanks all.

Put up your Dukes

What supernatural force dragged three gamers out of their warm homes and into the biting Siberian winds this Tuesday night? What tempted us towards Joe's house where he waited for us, not so much a host, more a Siren, calling gamers to dash their dreams of victory against his jagged rocky shoreline of defeat.

We were a group of just four: Joe, Ian Katy and me. Joe was angling for a game of The Ruhr (I think), a new "old school" eurogame that involves the shipping of coal. Neither the theme nor the playing length attracted me - it would have taken up almost all of the evening - so Katy's suggestion of Lords Of Vegas won me over, then it swayed Ian and eventually persuaded Joe, too.

But not before a quick game of Tichu. We split into pairs, Ian & me versus Joe & Katy. The I&A team sped off into an early lead, thanks to Ian completing a Tichu and then a 1-2. But with the score at 405 to - 5, the K&J team leaped into action. Joe completed a Grand Tichu and they did a 1-2 in the same round to make it 405-395. Then, in a further display of his mastery of the game, Joe completed another Tichu and another 1-2! Seven hundred points in two rounds. Astonishing.

Joe and Katy 695
Ian and Andrew 405

So, next up was Lords of Vegas. I secretly harboured thoughts of revenge over Joe, but instead we all got a thorough lesson in how to play the game. Joe began exceptionally. His first three dice soon each controlled two-tile casinos, which then proceeded to pay out.

The secret of his success was, when he built his first casino, he briefly mistook gold for brown. He had originally wanted brown, and was about to put the gold tile down when he decided that this was destiny, and he built a gold casino instead. It was only one of his many good decisions.

Meanwhile, the rest of us made do with 'pocket casinos', as we called little one-tile casinos dotted around the board. Ian tried a bit of psychological tactics. When Joe offered a good location to him, Ian said he'd buy it for $10 million but only if he bet $5 million in Joe's casino and won. Joe was stumped as he tried to work out how much he'd actually be paid for it.

As we played, Joe's kitchen oozed capitalism. During the game we made sure to always mention that we were dealing in millions, to heighten the sense of decadence and even our resident social conscious, Katy, found herself empathising with the mega-rich when she sighed "it's almost not good to have so much money."

This was because, as the game wore on, Katy's fortunes had turned from distant last to potential first and she'd been raking in the proceeds ever since. Taking over my three-tile casino by turning it into a four-tile casino when she drew a neighbouring location with a six on it was hard for me to take. I never got it back.

Joe played like a master throughout. His lead was never in doubt, despite Katy's plucky last minute attack. Joe's best move, in my opinion, was when he remodelled two of his neighbouring casinos into one big seven-tile casino. And he did this after he realised he didn't have enough money to do what he really wanted. God knows what that move would have been. Mind you, he then rerolled a six-tile casino hoping to get it from Katy but in the end Ian, with his single die, ended up as the boss, so it didn't all go Joe's way.

I struggled with getting control of anything until near the end when I remodelled my two-tile casino (with a six and a five) to the same colour as Ian's six-tile casino, netting myself a choice eight-tile casino on the strip. Alas it didn't pay out until game over. It couldn't get me out of last. Only enough to save me from total humiliation.

Joe 44
Katy 36
Ian 20
Andrew 18

Then we played Coup, a game that's been absent from GNN for far too long. We played three times and we won one each. Most people's strategy was to calmly insist they had a Duke while they picked up three coins. The games ended (in order of elimination)...

Andrew, tried to assassinate Joe who had a Contessa.
Katy, tried to assassinate Joe who had another Contessa.
Joe, tried to assassinate Ian who had the third Contessa!
Ian wins!

Andrew, wrongly challenged Ian's Duke.
Ian, wrongly challenged Katy's Ambassador.
Joe, tried to assassinate Katy who had the Contessa.
Katy wins!

Katy, tried to avoid assassination by saying she had a Contessa but she didn't.
Ian, killed by my coup.
Joe, killed by my coup.
Andrew wins!

We finished with No Thanks, which saw Joe return to his previous heights of skill after the random silliness of Coup.

Ian went for big cards, but not because he wanted to. Katy had a wide collection of disparate cards. I did okay with a couple of runs, but very little money at the end. Joe finished with one long run in front of him, as if he'd just played it in another successful game of Tichu.

Joe 5
Andrew 33
Katy 62
Ian 79

After this, it was a case of last visits to the toilet and then back out into the sub-zero night air with an extra layer of bonhomie to warm us on our way home. Big thanks to Joe for hosting and for showing us how winning should be done.