Isle of Games

 Isle of games? We all love games!

Sam picked me up at 7.30 on a clear Friday morning. We set off to distant shores for a couple of day’s board gaming with the old London crew. We picked up Chris along the way, noting with disappointment that he wasn't waiting for us at the window like an expectant puppy, and we sped off across the south of England to Portsmouth and, from there: the Isle of Wight!

Paul had moved there a couple of years ago and now we had the rare chance of taking eight bags of board games across the seas to a whole new island! GNN’s plan of world dominance is working perfectly!

We took the opportunity at Portsmouth to peruse the souvenir stand in the coffee shop and decided to buy Paul and Isle of Wight pencil. A shocking pink one. After all, we couldn’t come empty-handed.

Once over the Solent, which was so calm that you could’ve played Bandu on it, we weaved our way through some country roads to Paul’s home in Shanklin. The only downside of living here is that the name suggested the Smiths song “Frankly Mr Shankly” which, in turn, led Sam to periodically sing “and I’ll meet you at the cemetery gates” throughout the weekend.

As for games, our first (at 2.20pm) was a historical one. Not just because 7 Wonders is set in the Ancient world, but because we were using the last page of the book of scoresheets. Chris said that you couldn’t buy replacements any more since the iconography had changed, so he’d buy a new one and leave this copy on a high shelf somewhere to see out it’s old age in peace. We used our new pencil to mark down the final scores and Sam’s sciences (34 pts) won.

Sam 59

Paul 54

Chris 50

Andrew 47

Paul then tried to choose a game at random by giving Chris directions (“Light green bag, third game from the back”) but that didn’t really work. Instead, I suggested Railways of the World and so we got out the old eastern US map and got to work. Paul chose his baron based solely on the man’s beard. Sam leapt into an early lead as he picked up bonuses and kept his bond count low. I went the other way, being bond-heavy and even having to pay money back once at the end of a round instead of taking income like everyone else. It kind of kept me in the game, as Chris and I fought over second until my seven bonds dragged me back. Chris ended on two bonds and $74,000. 

Sam 64

Chris 56

Andrew 50

Paul 34

Then we played a quick couple of rounds of Cross Clues (20 points and then 24) before I went for a half hour nap and the other three played Planet Unknown. I came in for the final third of the game and became fascinated at how people moved their cubes up the bonus tracks. Sam and Chris rolled them upwards, Sam with his index finger and Chris sometimes using his thumb, while Paul picked his cubes up and moved them square by square. In the end, Sam was one square tile away from completing the planet, hence his comprehensive win.

Sam 75

Chris 58

Paul 50

Then Sam cooked our first lovely meal of the weekend while us three played Cascadia. According to my notes, we indulged in a lot of bad animal puns while playing but thankfully I didn’t write any down.

Chris 98

Paul 89

Andrew 77

Then we ate Sam’s chicken fajitas which were delicious but Sam berated himself over the lack of chilli.

For the evening’s main event, we chose Keyflower. As is usual, Sam and I were taken by the artwork on the little cottages with individual interiors that allowed you to almost make up a story about the occupants.

After a rules refresher from Chris, we got playing. The only setback was caused by the meeple bag and tiles bag both being black such that when Chris went to draw some tiles mid game, he found it half-full of meeples. Paul won, despite having the smallest village. Or maybe because of. I’m not sure.

Paul 48

Andrew 44

Sam 38

Chris 34

Then we played Push It to clear the eurogaming fog in the air. We played twice as teams and Chris and Sam beat Paul and I twice, 11-2 and 12-3.

Paul got the nickname “the hammer” as his forceful play would usually send either the jack or his puck whizzing down the end of the table, occasionally bouncing off my tin of beer with a comedy “boinggg.”

Sam started to make moves for bed until he heard that we were going to play So Clover and he quickly retook his seat at the table.

We did well, 22/24, but were stymied by a cruel decoy on Chris’ clover that had words that would fit perfectly with three possible clues.

Then, with Sam definitely going to bed, we played King Domino. In fact, we played it so quietly that Sam popped back in to make sure we were actually playing.

I got a mine-monopoly for a win.

Andrew 56

Chris 52

Paul 30

And so to sleep.

Saturday morning was clear and limpid. We were all up by 9am and Chris made a fried breakfast before we went for a walk towards the sea, popping into a few shops as we did. 

Finally, at about noon, we played our first game. After a little discussion I said I was leaning towards Imhotep and so it was brought to the table. Paul played a cagey game, relying on the Burial Chamber and picking up cards such that he didn’t score at all until round 5. Chris won the obelisk, I tried to boss the pyramid and Sam relied on end-of-game scoring cards.

Chris 42

Paul 41

Andrew 35

Sam 34

Chris was delighted at his win at this game - his bette noir of board games. A then, after that, they went for a quick walk while I made pizza. On their return, Paul suggested playing Push It, but this time using an old magnetic football pitch that once belonged to Sam but Paul found it while moving house. The fact that it had borders seemed to dissuade Paul from his hammerish ways and he played a more measured game, posting a last minute comeback that was just a little too late.

Sam 12

Chris 9

Paul 8

Then, while the pizza was cooking, we played Cross Clues but did really badly: monkey and cow were both in play, as were plate, tomato and orange.

After pizza the table was slowly moved away from the wall to allow us enough space for a game of Xia: Legends of a Drift System. Sam set up the table and side table, requesting that no one ask him any questions while he did, so Paul and Chris did the washing up.

Paul (and I) got a rules explanation. Then, in the game Sam went exploration crazy while I just traded. I played a very chilled game, so that when I got a mission to kill an outlaw I rejected it for being out of character.

Chris was an early leader and the first to get a tier 2 ship. But Sam was close behind him, especially after he rolled a 20 and got another fame point. 

Paul turned rogue, after he was caught trying to transport prisoners across a planet border. Sam was out exploring when he was caught in a gravitational anomaly that dragged him into a star. 

While Paul chased after a non-player ship, Chris became an archaeologist, rolled a 20 and then reached 12 points, our target for this game. Sam needed to get two fame points to match Chris so he went on a crowd pleasing journey across as many borders as possible hoping to roll a 20. Which he did! But he picked up so much damage that the next scratch on his ship killed him. 

Paul went crazy with his last turn. Attacking me (but my shield, useless until then, repelled him) and then attacked Sam too. Finally he also tried a border crossing technique in search of the elusive 20, which he got but only slightly before his ship disintegrated.

Chris 12

Sam 10

Paul 8

Andrew 5

We ended at 5.15, a little under 3 hours of play. It's always a satisfying feeling after finishing a big game even if, as in this case, we lowered the winning score from 20 down to 15 and then 12. Still, a lot of fun.

Paul started prepping his chicken for the evening meal so Sam, Chris and I played Bandu. I thought I was being mean with my choices for Chris but clearly not being mean enough.

Chris

Sam and Andrew out in the same round

Then while Paul's curry was cooking, we played Fun Facts. We learned that we all have similar ideas about how grown up we feel (between 60-75) and that Sam and Chris hardly ever carry cash.

As Paul cooked, I took a shower and after a quick chat about politics, we sat down to eat. It was lovely although Chris bit on the only chilli in the mix and needed a moment to recover.

Next up was another epic: Northgard. Chris insisted on using the miniatures, not the cubes. "It needs the plastic vikings," he asserted. Paul quickly made three enclosed spaces and ran off into an early lead. It actually started very peacefully until Sam got his third big building and I was able to defeat him with the last card in my hand.

After that it was a ding-dong battle between me and Sam with Chris lurking nearby, hoping we'd weaken ourselves enough that he could pounce.

We made it all the way to round seven. REM on the stereo sang "The time to rise has been engaged," which seemed appropriate. Paul passed first, clearly the points leader. 

I get my third building off Chris but in the end only Sam has cards left in his hand. He attacks Chris first, but fails. Then me, but again fails. Finally, in an audacious tactic that even Napoleon would have loved, he took one solitary viking and sent it against my least defended building (only two vikings) needing some luck with the dice.

He didn't get it and I hung on for a win. Phew, another epic.

But, for the record the points were

Paul 84

Chris 64

Andrew 47

Sam 37

Finally we thought we'd wind down with Decrypto. Surely after two epics, this would last a more manageable length of time.

How wrong we were as it went all the way into round eight. Chris and I definitely got one of their words and were good at selecting another, but two of theirs eluded us. They, too, struggled to pin down our words. 

At one point Chris scared me by reading the wrong numbers when he announced his guess but he quickly corrected himself.

Finally in round eight, Sam and Paul had their second miscommunication and Chris and I were weary winners.

Chris and Andrew, tapping your phone line

Sam and Paul, tapping their feet

Another post midnight finish for the four of us.

Sunday began for most at about 9am although Chris had been up with a stomach ache for some time. Too much rich food and port, he said.

With an eye on our 11.30 departure time, we played only a couple of games. First was Alhambra. Among the money dealt to Paul at the start of the game were several '1's, giving him flexibility when buying tiles. Chris seemed to poo-pooh flexibility as he quickly built a wall around his small Alhambra, giving him a lot of early points for a long wall but few options for expansion.

Paul 120

Andrew 101

Sam 95

Chris 83

We packed up the car and had 40 minutes left so we ended with a game of So Clover. And what an amazing experience it was. All I can say is that So Clover is not a morning game. We all did badly, and we even managed to get every single guess wrong on Paul's clover and then only one right on our second guess. 

Everything is wrong

9/24

Shocking. We could blame the looming deadline but I don't think we'd have done much better with more time.

And with that we set off into the storm and back to home. Thanks for the weekend, Paul, and thanks to everyone for the memories. It was special.

Chippencon!

Friday

With Paul J the quiet instigator of the idea, the old London branch of GNN coalesced this weekend at Chris's house in Chippenham: as well as the host, Paul J and myself there was Paul H for the duration, Stuart on Friday night and then Andrew on Saturday. 

But all this was ahead of us as I arrived at midday on Friday and after catching up with Jacquie and the kids, Chris and I shot off to collect Paul J from the station. Then after a second-wave newsbeat, we started gaming! We kicked things off with Babylonia, new to both Paul and Chris but a relatively easy teach. 

We played slightly too open, having the full board instead of the slightly condensed one for three, but that made it an easier learning game:

Sam 149

Chris 147

Paul 99

And now familiar with it, both were enthusiastic for another crack.

My long and arduous master-and-apprentice defeats at the hands of Martin stood me in good stead once more:

Sam 123

Paul 99

Chris 96

Lovely to find two more converts! We moved on to Sushi Go, the game of card-drafting Japanese foodstuffs. Owing to a misunderstanding over chopsticks, I ruled myself out of contention after round one, but it's not exactly a grind.

Paul 72

Chris 59

Sam 46

 Paul began a four-game winning run here, following his Sushi Go triumph with victories in Alhambra:

Kingdomino...

And Kingdom Builder.

Chris was appalled to finish third in every instance, voicing aloud his regret at the very idea of Chippencon. Things didn't improve immediately for him when Paul H arrived, as we kicked off with Tournament Raj and despite a huge last-round haul, he still finished last. Paul J and I slugged it out for first place, but he shrugged me off to claim a fifth victory in a row!

Paul J 60

Sam 51

Paul 45

Chris 33

With tea consumed - thank you Chris and Jacquie - and Stuart freshly arrived, we fancied something a bit feistier now, and so I talked them through the rules of Hansa Teutonica. 

Despite my encouragements to get sabotaging. everyone was very polite at the start and the first couple of rounds were slightly after-you-sir. But soon enough we were getting in each other's way and the cussing ramped up slightly. The initial sense of being hobbled by two actions fell away as we proliferated across the board and engines kicked into gear. 

After an hour of cross-postal interference, Stuart leapt from an innocuous fourth place into joint first with Chris, and I couldn't quite catch them. We checked the rules for a tie-breaker and Chris' fewer actions-per-turn won him the game!

Chris 38 wins tiebreaker 

Stuart 38

Sam 37

Paul H 29

Paul J 25

Now into the meat of the evening, we debated our five-player options. Paul J was understandably reluctant to learn another set of rules at this point, so we alighted on Istanbul, needing a mostly-fringe-area refreshment on rules. I forgot to take any photos at this point, but suffice to say Paul H was now warmed-up and moved through the gears to wrap up a relatively straightforward win, grabbing his fifth gem with the rest of us at least two turns away from doing likewise:

Paul H five gems!!!!

Sam  4 gems 31 cash 

Paul J 4 gems 6 cash

Stuart 4 gems 1 cash 

Chris 3 gems 13 cash 

The hour was getting late so with the request for something 'silly' I suggested Block Party.

Although this meant another set of rules, the fact they only take about 45 seconds to explain meant we were off and running quickly. And Chris made a banana. 

"I tried to bend it" he cried, but it mattered not: Stuart identified it. I guessed Paul H's spider and he saw the fire engine in my creation. We all ran the highs and lows of emotions - my milk bottle was alleged to be a snowman, a mountain, and an igloo - but ultimately the last game of the night saw Chris triumph:

Chris 11

Sam 10

Paul and Paul 8

Stuart 7

Saturday

I surfaced at around 8.15 to an extremely muggy day. We threw opens doors and windows to try and get some air into the house. Chester enjoyed having all these access points to the house. 

As well as the visiting articles to investigate. 

After breakfast, Jacquie liked the idea of trying out Block Party, so we did. Despite some creative performance anxiety, her debut creation was this beautiful pineapple:

However despite a frankly shambolic attempt at a door (in dubious colour choices of grey and pink) Chris triumphed again. I lost track of where Jacquie, Paul J and I finished.

Apart from that intense Block Party workout it was a fairly lazy morning. Paul H returned at 11am and while Chris prepped the chilli for later, he talked Paul J and I through the workings of Imhotep.

I think I played this about eight years ago, and I found it's piece-of-string machinations just as opaque this time, as players choose whether to add cubes to boats, or sail a full-enough boat to one of several possible destinations. It's fun, but I am really awful at judging anything being a good decision, and my focus on building a massive Burial Chamber didn't match up to the canny shenanigans of the Pauls, with Paul J claiming a debut victory!

Paul J 49

Paul H 41

Sam 39

Then with Chris back at the table, we returned to Babylonia. 

This was a corker, as leads between the Pauls and Chris ebbed and flowed whilst I languished back on a measly five points, hoping to draw enough farmers to use my ziggurat power. They didn't arrive and I had to focus my efforts building a central network that Chris spotted was going to haul me in some juicy points when they started paying out. I agreed, but I didn't think I'd close the now huge gap between Paul J (at this point) on something like 110 while I was back in the 30's somewhere. But as it turned out, it was damn close!

Chris 138

Sam 136

Paul J 130

Paul H 107

A baptism of fire for Paul H, then, but the next game - after our classic Lunch of Beige - was one he knew intimately: Eclipse! 

This was Chris's second-edition version, with some minor rules modifications (and one less round) and some faction asymmetry, but largely the same narrative: early rounds are developing tech and kitting out ships, building towards a massive bunfight at the end. Except here the bunfight never really materialised: Paul H and I established an alliance, and Chris and Paul J did the same.  Chris considered attacking Paul H, but decided against it because it looked like a death wish.

My dreams of peaceful expansion were undone by poor planning and ill fortune and I spent a few rounds only doing two actions and then passing early. The others expanded more successfully and built monstrously-violent death machines of the cosmos in a sort of cardboard cold war.

Then at the death Chris attacked the central hex and quickly reenforced his dominance there. He tried to take some hexes off me but didn't roll what he needed and we all eyed him warily. Oddly, his aggression went unrewarded in the sense of point-scoring, with Paul H's 'In Bed With the Ancients' faction grabbing victory:

Paul H 33

Paul J and Sam 32 each

Chris 30

Though it was certainly not a damp squib, I didn't enjoy Eclipse as much as I used to. It's a long haul to get to the more-exciting finale (caveat: my adjacency to that was more my fault than the games') and at times it feels a bit like a slightly protracted drum-roll. There's a lot to consider as well, and if it's a more elegant construction than Xia's everything-by-dice, it doesn't feel as stupidly fun. 

Speaking of dice, though, next up - after the very delicious chilli, and a quick sortie to the shops - was Las Vegas. It's not a game that supplies quite the epic narrative Eclipse does, but it was a nice pallet-cleanser:

Sam $510k

Paul J $470

Chris $380

Paul H $280

We knew Andrew was imminent, but just had enough time for another four-hander in the little-seen (by me at least) Timeline! I couldn't help but notice a seam of dark comedy in the images, with a number of characters looking vaguely psychotic.

Paul H won this. I discovered the refrigerator was invented much earlier than I'd anticipated, but now with crushing inevitability the exact year escapes me.

Paul H wins

Sam and Paul J 1 card

Chris 2 cards 

Andrew arrived just as we finished and after the briefest of catch-ups the discussion of what to play as a five began. Dominant Species? A bit long. Twilight Imperium? Very long. Istanbul? A bit short. We settled on Lords of Waterdeep. With no Martin or Ian present I elected to play green, so the colour/game combo made it feel a bit like 2010, as Prince used to sing.

Early on it was fairly even - I shot off on the scoretrack to 32 but had a bunch of skulls that made my actual score a current 14. Paul H pulled ahead and played some dastardly intrigue that balanced out revealing his Lord with the fact we couldn't target him all game. That was a bummer. Meanwhile I pulled ahead again, and Chris targeted me with one of those bastard mandatory quests that I'm definitely not still sore about. Andrew mostly chuckled at the names of the quests.

Incredible scenes at the end as Paul H pulled so far ahead it was almost embarrassing. My late game recovery wasn't enough to catch a resurgent Chris, and a briefly-dominant Paul J found Andrew had enough to sneak past him in the final count.

Paul H 166

Chris 148

Sam 144

Andrew 134

Paul J 131

After twelve hours of gaming I suddenly got hit by an ocular migraine, and had to play my final game (Incan Gold) with my eyes largely closed and Chris communicating events to me ("Zombie Lady!"). Paul J and Chris lacked our frugal conservatism and, falling behind, risked life and limb - and ultimately lost life and limbs - in wild attempts to recover.

In the end, however, it was Paul H who took yet another win!

PH 34

Andrew 32

Sam 26

Chris 20

PJ 0

And at this point, with my vision no better, I had to take myself to a dark room. It was a bit of a underwhelming way to end Chippencon and I was gutted to miss Chris and Andrew take on the Pauls in Decrypto! The Pauls won, though what the words and dramas were maybe we'll learn in the comments.

Thanks to Chris Jacquie and kids for putting up with us all, and everyone attending for making it fun.  

Manila favoured

This week's gaming was hosted by the ever genial Joe. At first we were six (Joe, Sam, Martin, Katy, me and, making his debut for 2017, Andy) with a seventh (Ian) coming later.

As a six , after initial greetings and conversation, we got down to the nitty gritty of deciding what to play. This process was made a little more difficult by the fact that the bulb in Joe's utility room had gone.  Lack of visibility aside, Joe offered up Dream Home. No one seemed keen and, for myself, I have difficulty with the rather prim artwork. Joe's sales pitch that his daughters liked it didn't sway me. Instead we went for Team Play with Sam graciously not vetoing the choice. He is not a fan of the game and by the end he was thinking of variants.

Joe and Andy sped out of the blocks, looking to end the game quickly by finishing off some cheap and easy objectives. Sam and I went for the opposite: high scoring but difficult. Not that we had a great deal of choice, it was just what we were dealt. I ended the game with the same mission card in front of me that I started with.

Katy and Martin, the two doctors, also went for quality albeit a little more efficiently than Sam and I did. They won, despite having two fewer mission cards than Andy & Joe. Plus, their average points per mission was the same as ours.

Martin & Katy 20
Joe & Andy 19
Sam & Andrew 16

After this, we split into two groups of three. Sam finally got his introduction to Imhotep, along with fellow newbie Andy being taught the rules by Martin.

Aware that Ian would be arriving at some point, Katy, Joe and I went for a co-operative game, Colour Wheel from the games compendium Pyramid Arcade. I explained the tiny amount of rules and we were off. We didn't play in silence, and a couple of moves raised some eyebrows in puzzlement, but we refrained from telling each other outright what to do.

During this game, Ian arrived and he was quickly enrolled on to the wheel. Perhaps too quickly, as he stared, baffled at the multicoloured pyramids for a good couple of minutes before he passed, saying his brain wasn't up to speed yet. Then he sat down. For the first time this evening. Sorry, Ian. Should've given you time to at least get your feet under the table.

Finally, Colour Wheel came to a close, with all of us confidently saying it could be done in two moves. All of us except Joe, whose go it was.But despite the last minute pressure, we cleared the challenge with two moves to spare.

We win!

So,with Imhotep still mid-game, the four of us chose our main course for the evening: Manila. A lovely game. Perhaps one of my favourites, as I somewhat oversold it as the board game Grand Theft Auto. I was asked how and I said, well, you can deliver goods or be a pirate or...

Anyway, the game involves betting on the arrival (or non arrival) of boats laden with goods. And while dice make move them along, being the Harbour Master allows you to alter the starting position.

The bidding for this privilege was harsh. I think it never went for less than ten, and sometimes as much as twenty. Also pivotal was the pirate option. Ian took it twice, with no reward while my two attempts both ended in success.

Joe went for shares and played, as I recall, quite a sensible game. Apart from when he started babbling about selling his bum at the harbourside. Not sure what prompted that. Also we discussed the unit of measurement known as the fuck-ton, and decided it was probably equivalent to five shitloads.

Around this time, Imhotep ended. Sam's mid-game bout of analysis paralysis perhaps pointed to a difficulty with the game, but he wasn't too far behind. Martin, meanwhile, loses at Imhotep by one point again.

Andy 46
Martin 45
Sam 35

Then they played Eggs Of Ostrich. All I remember about this game is whenever I looked over, they were all playing the same card.

They played two rounds:

Martin 11
Andy 9
Sam 7

Sam 11
Martin 4
Andy 2

Then, while we four were still bickering about silk and ginseng, they began a game of Cottage Garden. This passed me by as I was deep in the grip of Manila-fever, trying to squeeze profits out of the final rounds.

In the end, I went for the pirate route and it came off dramatically. I got a whole boat to myself and steered it in to port. As the final count was made, Katy seemed confident. You can imagine her dismay at the final reckoning:

Joe 145
Andrew 143
Katy 132
Ian 72

Cottage Garden, too, ended about now.

Martin 57
Sam 53
Andy 46

So with all seven of us together, we decided on Fuji Flush to end the evening, accompanied by some whisky from Lidl served in hot glasses straight from the dishwasher. Katy also wanted to play Dead man's Chest, but when Joe went to get it, the lack of light meant the box he chose was actually Hanafuda. A great game, but only plays two.

Anyway, Martin wasn't keen on DMC, so we charged through three raucous rounds (maybe a bit too loud) of Fuji Flush. As an addition, I also kept track of those infamous Dick Moves, when a player ruins other players' chances of success by only a single point.

Andrew 0
Sam 1
Ian 1
Martin 3
Katy 3
Andy 3
Joe 3

In this round, we started with six cards each which Andy pointed out was wrong: for seven players it should be five. We were all stunned by the sight of Martin getting a rule wrong. Sam seemed happiest as he sat back in his chair and said “Welcome to the club, Martin.”

And then...

Katy 0
Andy 1
Joe 1
Martin 2
Sam 2
Ian 3
Andrew 3

And finally, what a finale! Four of us checked out at the same time by playing four 10 cards!

Sam 0
Martin 0
Katy 0
Andrew 0
Joe 1
Andy 1
Ian 1

Phew. And who played the most dick points across the three games?

A photo of a dick, mid-move

Katy 7
Joe 6
Andy 6
Sam 5
Martin 5
Ian 4
Andrew 1

Oh, Katy, you're so cruel. Good thing dick points aren't Leaderboard.

Talking of which, this week's Division is full of treats and surprises.

Let me just explain these new categories. In Best Sport, a player gets a point if they agree to play a game they're bad at (“bad at” defined as: their average score is only one half or less of the leader's score). Cup Upset is when a player who until now was especially bad at a game (average score one third or less of the leader's score) actually wins it. And Total Dominance is awarded to a player if a result pushes or maintains their average score at 80% or higher of the leader's score.

Just for the record, Martin's points in Total Dominance come almost exclusively from Eggs of Ostrich, but also from Imhotep too. Even though he hardly ever wins it. Ian's comes from Eggs of Ostrich. Joe's is from Manila. And Sam's comes from Fuji Flush and Rolling America.

And the Cup Upsets were: Katy (Eggs of Ostrich and Fuji Flush); me (Imhotep); Sam (Mamma Mia and Eggs of Ostrich); and Matt (both from Eggs of Ostrich)

Hmm, Eggs of Ostrich seems to be quite a swingy game.

Anyway, thanks all. It was a pleasure.